Any Romantic Fairytale
by twenty3
Summary: If you loved someone more than anything, what would you risk to keep them safe? For Nick, it's everything. NickGreg SLASH. Rated M for language, violence and slash.
1. The Burden

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with CSI.

* * *

Greg jumped when strong arms wrapped around his waist from behind. He relaxed when he realized who it was and turned his head to smile at Nick.

"Happy anniversary." Nick whispered in Greg's ear.

Greg's smile widened. "You're supposed to be at work."

Nick took a step away from Greg, who turned around to face his boyfriend. "Nice to see you too." Nick said in mock-anger. He tried to walk past Greg, but was stopped when the younger CSI grabbed him by the shoulder and pushed him down onto the couch. The spiky-haired ex-labrat let himself fall onto Nick and smiled happily after having done so.

"You know I'm always happy to see you." Greg said before he kissed Nick's lips quickly. He shrugged slightly before saying, "I just thought my Thursday boyfriend got his days mixed up again and might have showed up today...that was a close call last time."

Nick rolled his eyes at Greg and pulled his head back when Greg leaned down to kiss him again. "Go kiss your Thursday boyfriend." He said sarcastically.

Greg tried his best to hold back his smile, but wasn't succeeding. "Awww come on Nicky. None of my other boyfriends are half as good at kissing as you are." Greg decided it was a good time to use his famous puppy dog eyes on Nick...again. "Please? It's our four year anniversary...you really should be used to me saying stuff like that by now."

Nick gave in to his own smile that had been tugging at his lips. "Yeah, good point." Nick reached up and threaded his fingers through the soft hair on the back of Greg's head and gently pulled his lips down onto his own. The kiss quickly intensified and resulted in Nick pushing Greg up off of the couch and into the bedroom, with both of their clothes somehow being removed in the process.

* * *

Greg rested his head on Nick's shoulder as he drew lazy circles on Nick's bare abs. He let his tired eyes slowly close and sighed happily. "That was fun." 

Nick laughed and kissed the top of Greg's head. "Always is G."

Greg gave up on his geometry lesson and threaded his fingers with Nick's. "Can you believe it's been four years?" He said as he opened his eyes.

Nick nodded as he continued to trace the faint scars on Greg's back. "Yeah, I can. After all that's happened, it seems like it's been longer though."

Greg thought about it for a minute before nodding in agreement with Nick. "Yeah, that's true. It's been a pretty rough couple of years."

"This job's always rough." Nick said sadly.

"Especially for you." Greg said carefully.

Nick shrugged. "It was no big deal."

"Yeah, sure looked it. I don't know how you got through everything you did."

Nick squeezed Greg's hand firmly, but gently. "You."

Greg craned his neck so he could look into Nick's brown eyes. "What?"

Nick shifted slightly and smiled weakly. "I uh...never told you this...but when I was buried alive...I thought about you then entire time I was down there." Greg stared back at Nick silently. "Whenever I wanted to just end it and pull the trigger, you're what stopped me. You kept me going, and have ever since."

"Wow...I didn't know that." Greg said quietly.

Nick laughed humorlessly. "Well, there's a lot you thankfully don't know about me." Nick said before he thought about what he was saying.

"Like what?" Greg's curiosity never failed him.

Nick silently cursed to himself. "Nothing bad...just stupid stuff that happened to me when I was a kid."

Greg picked up on the change in tone in Nick's Texan accent. "Nick...what happened to you when you were a kid?"

"It's nothing. No big deal now, it was almost 30 years ago."

Greg slowly released Nick's hand and sat up next to him. "I'm trying not to pry, but I can tell it's more than you're saying it is. And I'm not gonna lie, it's kinda scaring me." He reached out and ran his hand through Nick's short, dark hair. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

Nick nodded slowly and closed his eyes. "When I was nine...my parents went out to some Christmas party for my dad's work, and all my sisters and my brother were all at parties. So my mom had to call this last minute babysitter that lived a few houses down." Nick shook his head slowly and opened his eyes. "We were just watching TV...then she...started kissing me and rubbing my legs and wouldn't stop. She said I had been bad and was being punished...and if I told anyone I'd be in even more trouble. So I never did."

Greg looked down at Nick and the look in his eye's made his heart break. He was completely speechless. What was he supposed to say to that? They sat in silence for a long time. The entire time, Greg couldn't help but think that every time they had had sex, it could have brought up a memory of what his babysitter from Hell had done to him. If he had touched him somewhere she did or did something she had done...Greg couldn't bare the thought that he had hurt Nick, especially like that.

Nick had broken eye contact with Greg a long time ago. He was staring at the bedroom door as if he were in a trance. The silence was starting to drive him crazy. Someone had to say something.

"I get it if you don't wanna be with me anymore Greg." Nick said quietly.

Greg snapped out of his staring contest with Nick, who hadn't been participating. "What? Why wouldn't I want to?"

"Because I'm fucked up. I always knew I didn't deserve you and I'll never be good enough for you. It's okay, I understand."

Greg shook his head rapidly. "Nicky, you have no idea what you're saying."

Nick nodded slowly. "Yeah, I do." He looked back up at Greg. "I never understood why you were with me this long, but it's the best thing that's ever happened to me so I didn't question it too much. You can do better than me, you know that."

"What are you talking about? I love you cuz you're an amazing person...why would I want anyone else?"

Nick closed his eyes again and let his head fall back against the pillow behind him. "I never wanted you to know what I was like before I met you, so I told you a lot of lies."

"Like what?" Greg asked, still not believing Nick.

Nick sighed, his eyes still closed. "Remember when you asked me when I lost my virginity, and I told you I was 18?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah..."

"Well, technically I was nine cuz of the whole babysitter thing...but I'd rather not count that." Nick opened his eyes and looked up at Greg. "I was fourteen."

Greg shrugged slightly. "That's not that bad."

Nick went on. "And ya know how I said I didn't have sex with that many girls when I was in high school and college? Well that was an even bigger lie. I'd have sex with anyone who'd let me...which was a lot."

Greg grabbed Nick's hand in his again and rubbed it gently with his thumb. "I don't care, it's not that big of a deal Nick. You're worrying over nothing."

"That's not even the worst of what I've done."

"I'm sure you couldn't have done anyth-"

Nick cut him off. "I was a drug dealer for a while."

Greg shook his head slowly. "What?"

"Yeah, me and my room mate in college. I needed money, so we got into it. I actually got a kid killed because of it." Greg stared back at Nick silently. "Yeah, he died because of me."

"Nick...wh-"

Nick cut him off again. "I did drugs too, I didn't just sell them." Nick stretched his left arm out to Greg and showed him the faint scars on the inside of his arm. "Heroin." He said simply.

Greg pushed Nick's arm away. "Why are you telling me all this?"

Nick sighed. "I want you to know the truth about me so that you understand what an awful person I actually am and that you should be with someone better than me."

Greg shook his head. "Why are you all of a sudden like this? It's like someone flipped a switch and you immediatly changed or something. This is insane."

"I just...I don't know what got into me. I was just thinking about how lucky I am to be with you for this long...and couldn't lie to you about what I used to be like anymore." He tightened his grip on Greg's hand. "I know it sounds stupid and not important...but I just...wanted you to know I guess."

Greg shifted himself so he was straddling Nick's lap, still holding his hand. "I love you no matter what you may have done when you were younger. Everyone's done stupid things, it doesn't change how I feel about you now. It does't matter what you did...it's what you do that I love." He smiled down at his boyfriend. "Don't worry, I'm not gonna leave you. You're stuck with me Nicky." He leaned down and pressed his lips to Nick's.

Nick smiled into Greg's kiss. He pulled away slightly so that their lips were just barely touching. "I love you so much Greg. No matter what happens...always remember that. I'd do anything to keep you safe."

"What's wr-"

Nick silenced Greg with another kiss. "Just promise me you'll always remember that."

Greg nodded slowly. "I promise."

Nick smiled again and pulled Greg into a breath taking kiss, holding him as close as possible and never wanting to let go.


	2. Crashing Down

Greg rolled over onto his back and lazily stretched his arm out across the rest of the bed next to him. When he felt nothing but the cold sheets, he frowned and slowly opened his eyes. He craned his neck to the side to look at where Nick was supposed to be, but for some reason wasn't. 

Greg rubbed the sleep from his eyes and slowly forced himself to get out of his nice warm bed. His bare feet hit the cold wood floor and sent shivers throughout his entire body. He made his way over to the dresser and pulled a pair of socks, some of Nick's sweatpants and a long sleeved t-shirt out and quickly put them on. Once he was nice and warm again, he made his way out into the rest of the house to look for Nick.

After searching the kitchen (where he made himself some coffee) and the living room, Greg gave up. He figured Nick must have been called in to work and didn't want to wake him up. After finishing his coffee, he headed into the bathroom and hopped into the shower.

After he got out, Greg put his comfy clothes back on and fell onto the couch. He wrapped himself in a fuzzy blanket while he pulled the clicker from in between the couch coushins and turned the TV on. After flipping through the channels for a little while, Greg surrendered to the fact that nothing worth watching was on at 2:53 on a Tuesday afternoon. He yawned and turned the TV off before dropping the remote to the floor and getting up off the couch to go back to bed.

Greg sank back into the warm sheets and pulled the blankets over him. He sighed contently and snuggled closer to Nick's side. Greg closed his eyes, only to open them seconds later. Something on the nightstand had caught his attention.

Sitting up so he could get a better look at the small table across the bed from him, Greg realized there was a folded piece of paper on the alarm clock. He scooted over so he could reach it. He grabbed it from the clock and smiled slightly when he saw his name was written on it.

He laid back down against the pillows and opened the small piece of paper up. His smile faded within seconds of reading what the note said.

_Greg,_

_Sorry it had to be this way, but I didn't have much of a choice. In case you haven't noticed yet, I'm not here. And I won't be ever again. I just can't do this anymore._

_I shouldn't have waited this long to tell you this, but I'm not in love with you anymore. I haven't been for a while. I never knew how to tell you, so I didn't. But now I know four years is long enough, and I need to get away._

_I can't keep pretending everything's okay or that I'm happy with you. To be blatently honest, you've basically ruined my life. I felt responsible for some reason after the lab explosion, and then you told me how you felt about me so I just went with it. At least now I know what a huge mistake that was._

_Don't come looking for me, because you're not going to find me. Just forget about me because I'm doing everything in my power to make sure I never see you again. These last four years have been the worst of my life, and I'm sorry to say I regret the day I met you._

Greg read the note three times before he finally believed what he was seeing. The lump in his throat was making it hard for him to breathe. He couldn't decide which was worse; what the note said, or the fact that it was in Nick's handwritting.

* * *

I know. Nick would never do that, and sorry to those of you who are mad I did this. But if you continue to read the rest of the story, you'll understand. Sorry this chapter was so short, the next one will be longer and up soon. 


	3. Rapture

Greg could hear the fast paced beating of his heart ringing in his ears. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. He opened them again slowly and looked down at the piece of paper in his hands. It was still there, despite his wishing it not to be. "This can't be happening." He said aloud to himself. He shook his head slowly as his voice faded to a whisper. "This isn't happening." 

_Why would he do this to me? This doesn't make any sense at all_. Greg was trying to slow down his thought process and look at the situation logically._ Okay..._ he said to himself, _just lay out all the facts._ _You wake up..no Nick...just this note. What it says can't possibly be written by Nick...yet it's in his handwritting. But why would he all of a sudden up and leave? Maybe it was the whole confession thing last night..._ Then he remembered Nick making him promise to always remember he loves him and would do anything to keep him safe. _Something's wrong...something bad happened to Nick._

His CSI training kicked in, causing Greg to immediatly drop the piece of paper back onto the nightstand. Without disrupting any possible evidence, he made his way into the kicthen and grabbed his cell phone and pushed speed dial 3.

"Hello?" It had taken a little longer than Greg was hoping for, but he finally heard the sleepy drawl of Warrick's voice on the other end of the phone line.

"Hey Warrick it's Greg." He said quickly.

"Hey Greggo, what's up?" Warrick asked, his voice still laced with sleep.

"Nick's gone." Greg said flatly.

Greg could almost hear Warrick waking up. "What? What do you mean gone?"

"He left." Greg said. "I woke up this morning, and he was gone. There was just this note that said..." He trailed off, not wanting to remember what the note had said.

"What did it say?" Warrick asked, now fully attentive.

Greg closed his eyes and leaned against the fridge. "That he was sick of me and was leaving...and not to bother looking for him because I wouldn't be able to find him because he's making sure he never has to see me again." A single tear sneaked it's way out from under Greg's closed eyelids and slowly slid down his cheek.

Warrick was silent for a minute as he tried to process the recent information Greg had given him. "You're joking, right?"

"I wish I was."

"Why...what...how..." Warrick was clearly in no state to formulate a sentence.

"I know." Greg said softly. He ran a shaky hand through his spiky brown hair. "Something's not right. This isn't like Nick to just up and leave. Just last night he told me to promise him to always remember he loves me and would do anything to keep me safe. What if something happened to him?"

Warrick took a deep breath. "Alright, let's slow down for a second. Is his car gone?"

Greg hadn't even thought about that. "Uh...I don't know, I didn't check." He walked over to the front door and opened it. He squinted against the bright morning light and looked into the driveway and saw Nick's Denali still parked next to his own. "Yeah, it's still here." He retreated back into the house, closing the door behind him. He went into the bedroom and quickly looked through the drawers and closet. "But some of his clothes are gone."

"So maybe he...I don't know. This doesn't feel right at all." Warrick paused briefly before deciding what to do next. "I'll be right over as soon as I call Brass. Don't touch anything, stay right where you are, okay?"

"Okay." Greg said and closed his cell phone before dropping it on the kitchen counter. He opened the fridge and took out a bottle of cold water and held it to his head while he massaged the back of his neck. It seemed like hours had passed before Warrick came through the front door and calmly walked into the kitchen behind Greg.

Warrick reached out and squeezed his shoulder gently. "How ya holding up Greg?"

Greg turned around to face Warrick. "I don't know. I don't know what to do or think...this is so fucked up. Where is he?"

"I don't know." Warrick said quietly. "Brass will be here soon and we'll get this all figured out."

Greg nodded slowly. "I haven't tried to call him...did you?"

"Yeah. Three times. Straight to voicemail."

"I just hope he's okay." Greg said. They fell into a stoney silence that lasted through the few minutes it took Brass to get there.

The police captain walked in through the still open front door with Gil Grissom at his side. They walked up to the two CSIs and smiled slightly. "Hey guys." Grissom said. "Where's the note?" He asked, looking at Greg and getting right to the point.

"Bedroom." Greg said simply. Grissom nodded once before turning and heading out of sight. He returned a few seconds later with a pair of latex gloves on holding a plastic bag with the note inside. He was reading it slowly, a look of disbelief on his face.

"Greg, are you sure this is from Nick?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah, it's his handwritting."

Grissom shook his head slowly. "This doesn't make any sense. Did you two get into a fight or something?"

Greg swallowed the lump in his throat and shrugged. "No. Everything was fine. He was acting a little weird last night, but other than that I have no clue what happened."

"How was he acting weird?" Brass asked.

"He just all of a sudden confessed a bunch of stuff...like what he did when he was younger and in college and everything. Nothing that really mattered or seemed relevant."

Brass nodded. "Is any of his stuff missing?"

"Some of his clothes, but not much." Greg's voice was now barely above a whisper. His hands were shaking slightly, and this caught Warrick's attention. He took a couple steps closer to Greg and put both of his hands on his shoulders, forcing the younger man to look at him.

"We're gonna find out what happened to him, okay? This isn't your fault." Greg nodded slowly. "Everything will be fine Greg. I promise."

Grissom smiled very slightly at the encounter between Warrick and Greg. The two CSIs had always gotten along fine, but now they were much closer friends instead of just co-workers. He was glad for it too. When Nick had been kidnapped, they had kept each other from going crazy. They were almost as good of friends as Nick and Warrick. But in Greg's defense, no one is as good of friends as Nick and Warrick. That Grissom knows anyway.

He sighed heavily. "Alright...I'm gonna get this back to the lab and the other things we took from the bedroom that could possible lead to where Nick is. There were fingerprints on some things that might help out, and we took all the blue pens we could find."

"Okay." Greg said weakly.

Grissom smiled as best he could and turned on his heel and left. Brass watched him leave before turning back to Greg and Warrick.

"I'm gonna go see what else I can do. Hang in there guys." He left as well.

Greg hung his head and walked over to the couch and collapsed onto it. Warrick followed him over and sat down next to him. They were silent for a few minutes before Greg spoke up.

"I drove him away, didn't I?" He said quietly.

Warrick shook his head right away. "No, that's not true. I don't know why he wrote what he did, but he loves you."

Greg didn't seem to be listening. "I don't blame him. I'm not good enough for him...no wonder why he left."

Warrick forced himself into Greg's line of vision and looked him right in the eyes. "Listen to me Greg. I have never seen Nick as happy as he has been since he's been with you. You should hear how he talks about you man. He loves you so much. There's a good explanation for what happened, and we're gonna find it. He really does love you, trust me on that."

Greg rubbed the back of his neck and took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I hope so. It doesn't matter if he does or not...I love him regardless of it. I just hope he's okay."

Neither one of them had anything left to say, so they just sat on the couch, lost in their own thoughts. After a while, Warrick had fallen asleep. Greg was thankful that at least one of them would get some sleep that night.

* * *

This took me a little longer to upload then I had hoped. I hope you enjoyed it. Next one should be up sooner than this one was. 


	4. Always You

Sorry, this took me a while to get posted because my computer's been messed up for a few weeks. Hope it was worth the wait. _Italics_ indicate thoughts and a flashback. Enjoy.

* * *

Warrick had been forced to go into work at around eight that night on a double homicide with Catherine, which left Greg alone again. He tried to watch some of the decent movies that were on TV, but none of them held his attention for more than five minutes. Not surprisingly, he couldn't keep his mind of off Nick. He was getting more worried by the second and couldn't make sense of what had happened. 

After he gave up on Fight Club, which was one of his favorite movies, Greg turned the TV off and forced himself to get off of the couch and get something to eat. He slowly walked into the kitchen and pulled open the fridge to find nothing worth thinking about eating. He sighed and closed the fridge as his cell phone, still on the counter from where he had last left it, caught his attention. The service light was blinking, meaning he had a voicemail. He reached out, grabbed it and flipped it open to read the display screen.

NEW VOICEMAIL.  
1 MISSED CALL: NICK

Greg's heart skipped a beat. He quickly dialed his voicemail number and tried to control the sudden shaking of his hands as he listened to the automated voice let him know he had a message.

"You have one unheard message. First unheard message:" Then Nick's voice came through the speaker into Greg's ear. "Greggo, you need to listen to me. Don't let anyone come looking for me and don't tell anyone I called. I can't explain where I am or why. Forget what I said in that note...I know this makes no sense and you're probably scared out of your mind, but you have to trust me. _**I love you Greg, don't ever forget that**_." Then there were people yelling in the backround, two other guys by the sounds of it. They were yelling at Nick to hangup and sounded pretty pissed. Then the automated voice was back. "End of message. To delete this message, press 1. To save this message, press 2." Greg pressed 2 before he hung the phone up and had to go sit down so he wouldn't pass out.

* * *

"So," Grissom said as he massaged his temples. "What can you tell me about this note?" 

"Well..." Dr. Adams, the lab's hand writing expert, said with a sigh, "it was definitely written by Nick. It's an exact match to the reports he's filled out that I used to compare with the note."

"Okay...anything else? Was he under stress when he was writing it or anything that may help?"

"Actually, the indentation is deeper in the note, and his letters are quick and rushed. I matched the ink to this pen." Adams said as he held up a blue Bic pen. "The tip is broken, which caused the few blotches on the ends of some letters. Mandy got a partial print off of it. But that's all I have for you Grissom. Sorry I couldn't be of more help."

Grissom smiled weakly. "You've helped more than you know, thanks Doc." He sighed as he left the layout room and headed for the haven of his office, where he could always escape from whatever was bugging him.

Or so he thought.

As he turned the corner to his office, he immediatly saw the back of Conrad Ecklie's head staring down at something on his desk. _Great._ Grissom thought. _Just what I need right now..._

"Can I help you Ecklie?" Grissom asked as he entered his office.

"You better hope so. What's this I'm hearing about Stokes disappearing?" Ecklie replied rather curtly.

"Well, we're not sure where **Nick** is." One of the things Grissom hated most about Ecklie was how he reffered to the members of his team by their last names, like they were insignificant to him. "He left a note saying things very uncharacteristic of him, and I think there might have been foul play."

"Do you have any evidence to support this?" Ecklie asked in his usual pissed off tone.

Grissom opened his mouth to answer, but was cut off by Brass, who had just walked into the office. "No, we don't. The Sheriff isn't making a case of this or allowing us to do anything that involves looking for Nick because he left a note saying he was leaving and says there's nothing more we can do."

Ecklie showed no emotion. "Alright then, it's settled. We'll start looking for a replacement for Stokes as soon as we can. It'd be for the best if we just put this behind us and move on. If he comes back, he comes back." And with that, Ecklie was gone.

Grissom shook his head slowly before slamming his fist down onto his desk. "This is fucking ridiculous." Brass stood there, shellshocked. He had never heard Grissom swear to that length before. The Graveyard supervisor rarely showed emotion, and when he did, he really showed it. "This is so...I can't think of a word to describe it. It's like Nick just vanished, and no one seems to care. It's like a bad dream."

"Hey," Brass said, holding up his hands, defending himself. "I care. And do you really think this isn't tearing apart Greg and Warrick? It really is one of the weirdest things that's ever happened. No hits came from the print off of the pen. There really is nothing left for us to do but wait."

Grissom sighed heavily and closed his eyes. "That's the worst feeling in the world."

"What is?"

"Waiting helplessly."

* * *

Greg sat with his head in hands on the couch, Nick's words echoing in his head like a song stuck on repeat. 

"_**I love you Greg, don't ever forget that**_."

Tears stung Greg's eyes, but he wasn't going to cry. Not this time at least. After his last relationship, he made himself promise to never cry over a guy again. He knew it sounded stupid, something a 15 year old girl would say. But he still wanted to try and spare himself the heartache.

Four years ago, Greg had broken up with his boyfriend of two years, Jeremy. They had met at a bar and a one night fling had turned into a two year relationship that some would have considered abusive, but Greg had put up with it. Then Jeremy had cheated on him, and Greg was heartbroken. Jeremy had told him he never meant anything to him and was just using him for the great sex. Greg felt lost and had no clue what to do. He changed from being hyper and talkative to quiet and depressed.

And Nick was the only one who had noticed.

_"Hey G." Nick said as he walked into the break room and took a seat next to the lab rat. Greg just merely nodded before standing and began to leave, but Nick grabbed his arm and gently pulled him back. "What's wrong Greg? You've been acting strange for the last couple of weeks. You alright?"_

_It was all Greg could do not to break down into tears. Ever since he had started working in Vegas he's had a crush on the Texan. He didn't want to let Nick see how weak he was, and he definitely wasn't going to tell him he was a little bit in love with him. Mostly because he was really in love with him. A lot._

_So he just shook his head weakly and gave the best smile he could muster. "Nothing, I'm fine."_

_Nick didn't let go of his gentle, yet firm grip on Greg's arm. He stood up so he could stand eye to eye with him. "No, you're not. Come on man, let me help you."_

_For reason not known to Greg, that did it. He just snapped and let go of all the pain not having Nick caused, added to what Jeremy had done to him. "Help me? Ya know what could have really helped Nick? You noticing how crazy I am about you, or doing more than just staring when you saw the bruises I have that you knew where from me getting beat up but didn't say anything to anyone except Warrick." _

_In response to Nick's dumbfounded stare Greg added, "I heard you two talking before shift a little while ago. But I can't blame you, because it's my fault I'm a loser who you'll never feel anything towards." Greg took a deep breath and let it out slowly as he took a step away from Nick. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, this isn't you fault. Just...forget I said any of this." And with that Greg was gone, leaving Nick stunned in place._

_Not long after Greg had gotten home and locked himself in his dark apartment, there was a soft knock at his door. Knowing who it was without even having to think about it, Greg yelled at the closed door without even lifting his head from its resting place on his knees. _

_"Go away Nick." Greg said from his cozy little spot up against the dishwasher in his kitchen._

_"Open the door Greg." The Texan yelled back through the door. "Come on man, I really need to talk to you."_

_Greg laughed humorlessly. "Why? So you can laugh in my face and tell me how disgusting I am before you punch me in the face?"_

_"It's gonna be kinda hard to punch you through this door G." Greg lifted his head at the sound of Nick calling him by the nickname he had given him. It always hit his softspot, something Nick did quite often. "This conversation would be so much easier if I could actually look at you ya know." When there was no response, Nick tried again. "I'll break it down if I have to. You know I will."_

_Nick smiled slightly when he heard shuffling footsteps inside the apartment, followed by the click of the lock and the door slowly swining open to let him inside. He couldn't see Greg, so he just stepped in and waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness as he faced Greg. When they finally made eye contact, everything Nick had wanted to say was washed from his mind._

_"Greg...I...we need to ta-"_

_Greg abruptly cut Nick off. "Don't Nick. Listen, I know it's not your fault I'm in love with you, and I shouldn't have told you or yelled at you. I'm sorry I brought it up, believe me. But I can't take you telling me all that. I already know, but you saying it might just kill me, so please just leave."_

_Greg closed his eyes and heard Nick take a few steps towards the door, but then he stopped. Before Greg could open his eyes to see why, Nick's lips were on his in what soon became a breathtaking kiss. It took a few moments for Greg to realize what was going on. When he finally did, he reluctantly pushed Nick away from him._

_"What the hell was that?" He asked quietly._

_Nick shrugged weakly. "I don't know. You wouldn't let me talk...not that I could anyway cuz what I wanted to say I forgot when I saw you and I just figured that was the best way to tell you."_

_"Tell me what?"_

_"That despite what you may think...I love you."_

_Greg slowly walked backwards until his back hit the door and he slowly slid down it until his knees where against his chest. He stared at the floor until Nick kneeled in front of him with his hands places firmly around Greg's._

_"Greg, I love you. I'm sorry I didn't do anything when I knew that asshole was hurting you. He doesn't deserve you, no one really does. I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you, but it's true. I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you ever again G."_

_Greg looked deep into Nick's eyes as a few tears ran down his cheeks. "You promise?"_

_Nick smiled and brushed away Greg's tears and cupped his face gently. "I promise." He leaned in slowly and kissed Greg so sweetly it was almost too perfect._

Regardless of what Greg had promised himself not to do, he started to cry. He just couldn't help it. Nick hadn't even been gone a day yet and he already missed him so much it hurt. He couldn't understand where he was or why he left. _If he really loved me, he'd stay, right?_ It hurt knowing that he might not ever see his boyfriend ever again.

But what hurt the most was knowing that Nick was worth every tear he was going to end up crying. Nick was worth anything to Greg.


	5. Not All Alone

Greg stood under the hot stream of water with his eyes closed and head titled forward slightly so the water could wash over his head and down his back. The steam had become so thick in the bathroom that he could barely see the shower wall two feet in front of him. That's how he knew it was time to get out and get dressed for work.

It had been a little over a month since Nick's disappearance. Nick's family had excepted the fact that Nick moved far away from Greg and started a new life. They somehow seemed to be okay with that. All of them except for Nick's older brother Matt.

Matt had been Nick's only family member who was immediatly okay with the fact that his little brother was gay. Of course he had done his fair share of joking around about it, but he was entitled to it by being Nick's older brother. He was the only one Nick kept close touch with and who came to visit them. When he heard about what had happened, he had immediatly flown out to Vegas from Chicago and stayed with Greg for a week before he had been called back to his law firm in Illinois. He still called at least twice a week to see how Greg was holding up.

Despite Nick's worst fears, he hadn't been disowned when he had come out to his family, but he might as well have been by the way they treated him. His father thought it was worse than Nick being a murderer and his mother couldn't understand why he couldn't just meet a nice girl and get married like he was supposed to. Nick's sisters hadn't been much of help either. He barely talked to any of them anymore, so their opinions didn't really matter all that much.

Greg had been amazed at how close Nick and Matt were. Brothers usually fought all the time and didn't get along. That's what Greg had thought anyway. He didn't have any siblings, so he could never really be sure. But Nick and Matt disproved his belief that brothers didn't like each other. They were like best friends and reminded Greg a lot of how Warrick and Nick were. He could still remember everything about the first time Greg had met Matt three and a half years ago.

_The doorbell rang, causing Greg to jump slightly. Nick shook his head and smiled slightly at his boyfriend's nervousness._

_"I'm telling you G, there's nothing to worry about. Matt's cool with us, relax." He said as he got up to answer the door._

_"Yeah, that's what they all say." Greg said to Nick's retreating back from the couch. "My boyfriend in college told me the same thing. Then when I met his brother, all I got out of that rendezvous was a black eye."_

_Nick rolled his eyes at Greg over his shoulder before opening the door to reveal a very similar looking guy on the other side._

_"Hey little brother!" Matt had a thicker accent than Nick, but their smiles were almost exactly the same. The older Stokes reached out and ruffled Nick's hair before pulling him into a brief hug. Nick stepped aside to allow Matt inside and closed the door behind them. Greg stood up slowly and gave the best smile he could muster while trying to push the memories of the last time he met an older brother to the back of his mind._

_"You must be Greg." Matt said as he crossed the living room over to in front of the couch where Greg was standing._

_"Yepp, that's me. Nice to meet you Matt." _

_"Likewise. Oh, and don't worry man. I'm not gonna beat you up." Greg blushed slightly and laughed weakly. "The door's not soundproof." Matt added with a smile._

_"I'll keep that in mind." Greg said. Nick came over and sat down on the couch next to Greg as Matt took the recliner facing them._

_"So you're a DNA tech in the Crime Lab?" Matt asked to spark a conversation._

_"Yeah that's right."_

_Matt nodded approvingly. "That's so cool. I saw a show on that type of job on Court TV before. You must make a lot more money than Nick huh?"_

_Greg laughed. "Yeah, actually I do." He said teasingly._

_Nick shrugged. "At least I'm not a kiss ass lawyer."_

_"And neither am I." Matt defended himself. "I put the bad guys away."_

_"Thanks to what we find out for you." Nick said with a smirk._

_Matt shrugged, making the resemblence between him and Nick even stronger. "Agree to disagree." Nick laughed at his brothers weak comeback and the three men fell into a semi-uncomfortable silence before Matt finally had to break it. "Look, I hate to bring this up, but have you talked to mom since you told her?" Matt asked Nick._

_Nick shook his head. "No, I called her last week and got the machine three times so I just gave up. Cisco answered once, but he hung up when he realized it was me."_

_Matt rolled his eyes. "They're being so stupid. Just because that's how they've been brought up to think doesn't mean it's right or that they can ignore their son forever."_

_"You know dad will try his best to succeed at that."_

_Matt shook his head in disagreement. "I think they'll come around sooner or later. Mom will realize how ridiculous this is. You're the youngest, there's no way they can try to just forget about you. They have nothing to be mad at you for."_

_"Well," Greg said, jumping into the conversation. "It's not exactly Nick's fault."_

_"Greg, don't." Nick said in an attempt to get Greg to stop talking, but it didn't work as well as he had hoped._

_"They hate me. Otherwise I don't think this would be that big of a problem."_

_Matt frowned in confusion. "How do they even know you?"_

_"After the whole stalker thing they came up to check on Nick and ended up meeting me. Weren't too pleased. Then when they found out it was me Nick was dating...well, they weren't too happy."_

_"It's not your fault they're insane Greggo." Nick said with a sigh._

_Matt nodded in agreement. "They'll realize eventually. Remember when you became a CSI and they acted the same way because you weren't a lawyer? They ended up talking to you again, didn't they?"_

_"Yeah, but only because-"_

_Matt cut him off. "No excuses. It's just a matter of time."_

_Nick smiled slightly and shook his head. "But what if you're wrong?"_

_Matt smiled. "Nicky, you know I'm not always right. But I'm never wrong."_

Greg smiled slightly at the memory of meeting Matt Stokes, who was almost the exact same person as Nick. He sighed as he remembered that he hadn't seen the Stokes he likes the most in over a month. He pulled into the parking lot at CSI and turned off his Denali. Instead of getting out, he leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes.

He sat like that for he didn't know how long until there was a knock on the driver's side window that almost gave him a heart attack. After almost jumping out of his skin, he turned his head to see who had tried to scare him to death.

Warrick smiled appologetically through the glass and laughed slightly. "Sorry man." He said loud enough so Greg could hear him. "You alright?"

Greg waited until the beating of his heart slowed down to almost normal before opening the door and closing it after he got out. He hung his head and shook it slowly. "No, I'm not." He said quietly.

Warrick looked down at the youngest CSI. He wrapped his arm around his friend's shoulder and smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry. You will be."

* * *


	6. It's a You Jump, I Jump Kinda Thing

Greg slammed his fist into his locker as hard as he could, which was pretty damn hard. Pain shot up from his knuckles through his wrist and all the way up to his shoulder. But Greg didn't care. He ignored the pain and punched the locker again, harder. He felt warm blood spill out of his knuckles and down his wrist and fingers. All the energy began to wash out of his body. He turned so his back was against the locker and slowly slid down to the floor until he was sitting down with his knees hugged up against his chest. 

His hands were shaking violently, but not from the pain of his boxing match with the locker. Whenever he was scared, his hands shook. He'd been blown through a glass window and had his hearing knocked out for two days, been beaten near death by a gang of teenagers, but he's never been as scared as he was right now.

He was lucky enough before to have Nick with him no matter what had happened. After the lab explosion, Nick had spent the entire time in the hospital with Greg. He kept him calm and held his hand through all the pain and fear. Nick had done the same thing after Greg was brutally beaten, even though that wasn't as bad. But now he didn't have Nick, and he didn't know what he was going to do without him. Not having Nick was the scariest thing in the world.

Greg hadn't even heard anyone walk into the locker room, so of course he was surprised when he felt someone's strong hands on his knees. He opened his eyes and wasn't surprised at all to see Warrick kneeling in front of him.

"Greg, what happened?" Warrick asked quietly. He looked down at Greg's battered hand and held back a sigh. He looked back up at Greg and clenched his teeth at the sight of how scared he was. It was evident in his eyes, and very understandable given the circumstances and case they had just worked. "Come on man, let's have Doc Robbins get this hand taken care of." Greg didn't protest to that, or fight Warrick off when he started helping him to his feet.

He was still trying to get his hands to stop shaking when they walked into the morgue and over to Doc Robbins, who was filling in some paperwork at his desk.

"How can I help you boys?" He greeted the CSIs.

"Greg uh...hurt his hand." Warrick explained, knowing very well that Greg wasn't going to say anything. He hadn't said much the entire case and wasn't expected to now.

Doc stood up and walked over to Greg, who help up his still shaking hand. Robbins took one look at it, then at Greg, who looked down at the floor. Robbins looked at Warrick, who nodded slightly even though he didn't have to. Doc knew all too well how Greg had hurt his hand.

"Let's get this taken care of, shall we?" He led Greg over to one of the examination tables and motioned for Greg to hop up onto it. He did so while the coroner got the necessary items to clean up Greg's hand. He returned with a bottle of alcohol, bandages, swabs and tape.

He checked Greg's hand and wrist to make sure nothing was broken before beginning to clean it. "This is gonna sting a little." Doc warned as he poured some of the alcohol onto the swabs to clean to cuts. Greg nodded slightly and winced when the cold liquid stung his bloody knuckles and fingers. This did nothing to stop the shaking of his hands. After cleaning the cuts, Doc gently wrapped Greg's hand with gauze and secured it with the tape.

"There ya go. Leave the bandages on for a little while so it won't get infected. Come back and let me check it tomorrow. Ice it when you get home for as long as you can. Nothing's broken, but you don't want it to swell up too much."

"Thanks Doc." Greg mumbled as he slid off of the table and started walking towards the door slowly. Once he was out of earshot leaning up against the doorframe, Robbins turned to Warrick.

"Keep an eye on him. It's only gonna get harder for him as time goes on. He needs you."

Warrick sighed. "I know. This is hard for all of us, especially Greg. I'm gonna take him home now. Thanks Doc."

"No problem." He said as he watched the two younger guys leave.

* * *

Greg had been silent the whole ride home. He had his head resting against the window with his eyes closed. His bandaged hand was resting in his lap. Warrick sighed at how sick Greg looked. He was very pale and had dark circles underneath his eyes. Warrick pulled into Greg's driveway 15 minutes sooner than he thought he was going to be able to. 

Warrick shook Greg's shoulder gently to wake him up, if he was even asleep. "You're home man."

Greg opened his eyes and sat up slowly. He gave Warrick a small smile. "Thanks." He looked down at the floor of the car and ran his good hand through is spiky brown hair. "Would you mind...could yo-"

Warrick cut him off. "Say no more." He turned off the car and took the keys out of the ignition. He smiled back at Greg before they got out of the car and headed up to the house. Warrick used his spare key to let them into the house so Greg wouldn't have to struggle with his hand. He closed and locked the door behind them and followed Greg into the living room. The younger man collapsed onto the couch. Warrick sat down next to him and waited for him to speak first. He didn't have to wait too long.

"I'm sorry Warrick." Greg said softly.

"You don't have to be sorry man. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I just...couldn't help it. After that case with that guy going crazy cuz his girlfriend left him...it was way to familiar." A few tears began to fall down Greg's cheeks. "I miss him so much."

"I know, I do too."

"That's why I'm really sorry, not just for the beating up the locker thing."

Warrick put his hand on Greg's shoulder. "Greg, how many times do I have to tell you this isn't yo-"

"Yes it is." Greg inturrupted. "He left because of me. You're never gonna see your best friend again because of **me**."

"That's not true." Warrick argued. "He's gonna come back and will have an amazingly good excuse. I know Nick better than I know myself. He loves you more than you know."

Greg wiped away the tears that were still falling from his eyes. "Then where is he?"

* * *

Warrick had once again been called into work, but not before the two guys had ordered a pizza and watched Wedding Crashers, which successfully got Greg's mind off of everything and let him relax. Warrick was glad to see Greg laughing again and not a complete mess. Just as the movie ended, Warrick reluctantly headed off to the crime scene in Henderson with Grissom. 

Greg put the ice pack back into the freezer and slowly flexed his fingers to try and get the feeling back in them. He was glad he couldn't feel anymore pain because of all the Advil and ice he had used to make it go away. He sighed and headed back into the living room, turned off all the lights, and slowly dragged his tired body into the bedroom.

It took him a little longer than it normaly did to get out of his jeans and button up shirt and into his comfy pajama pants and t-shirt, but he finally did it and crawled underneath the warm blankets. He snuggled into the pillows and let his tired eyes close.

For the first couple of weeks Nick was gone, Greg hadn't slept in their bed much. Nick's scent had only made things worse, so Greg had slept on the couch. Well, he hadn't actually slept much those first two weeks. Then one day, Warrick forced Greg to sleep in the bed so he would actually get some rest. Greg was surprised that Nick's scent was more calming then upsetting.

At first Greg was afraid that if he kept sleeping in the bed, the scent would fade. But it hasn't yet, which was very reassuring. No matter how many times Greg wore Nick's favorite A&M sweatshirt, it still smelled like Nick. And hopefully it always would. It gave Greg the feeling that Nick wasn't as far away as he actually was and let him fall asleep. Most of the time.

After rolling over a few times and adjusting the pillows, Greg hopped out of bed and quickly went over to the door where Nick's maroon Texas A&M sweatshirt was hanging. Without even having to turn a light on, Greg grabbed the hoodie and threw it on before returning to bed. He sank back into the sheets and hugged Nick's pillow tightly to his chest. He closed his eyes and tried to rid his mind of the thoughts that always plauged his mind whenever he tried to sleep. As much as he missed Nick, Greg just hoped he was okay and happy wherever he was. Finding out Nick was dead would be far worse then if he had in fact moved away and started a new life with someone else.

Greg remembered all too well the night Nick had been kidnapped. He remembered every single second that went by from the time he got the phone call from Warrick to when the doctors finally told him Nick was going to be fine and that he could go in and see his boyfriend. His hands always started to shake and he felt dizzy whenever he thought about how he had watched Nick suffer on the screen in Archie's A/V lab. Then when he had to spray the fire estinguisher on the ants had felt like he was trying to lift a car, not a fairly light red canister. The longest seconds of his life were when he watched Nick fly out of the box and sail through the air in slow motion until he landed on the ground and was whisked away in the ambulance. He wasn't able to move or speak. He didn't really remember the car ride to the hospital other than Grissom had kept shaking his shoulder to make sure he was alright.

And despite his worst fears, he had been okay, but only because Nick had made it. If Nick hadn't...Greg didn't like to think about what would have happened. If he had given up right there in front of himself and Warrick, things would have only gotten much worse. But he didn't. Giving up was never Nick's style anyway. He was way too strong for that. That whole ordeal had caused a lot of understandable emotional damage though. Nick would never let anyone but Greg see him break down. Not even Warrick.

Soon enough, without warning, Greg slowly difted off into a light sleep.

_Greg had been worrying about Nick all shift. When he had left that night, Nick had seemed out of it and really jumpy. After making sure he had taken his medication and made Nick promise three times to call him if he needed anything, Greg had been forced to go into work. He had a feeling in his gut the whole night that something was wrong. He got from the lab back to his house in record time. The eerie silence coated in darkness did nothing to settle his nerves when he walked in the front door._

_"Nick?" He called, not too loudly in case Nick was just sleeping. But Greg doubted it. He dropped his keys and wallet on the coffee table and threw his jacket onto the couch before heading off towards the bedroom. His heart sunk when he saw the door was closed and there was no light coming through the crack at the bottom of the door. Nick never closed the door, and the dark still scared the hell out of him. Something wasn't right at all._

_Without hesistating anymore, Greg reached out and turned the door knob, thankful it was unlocked. He waited a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the almost total darkness before he was finally able to see what was going on. His heart immediatly dropped to the bottom of his stomach and his hands started to shake violently._

_Nick was laying on his back on the bed with his gun in his hand. His eyes were closed and he was completely still. Greg's first thought was that he had killed himself. But then his CSI training kicked in and he realized there was no blood, and Nick's chest was slowly moving up and down. Greg quickly but silently made his way over to the bed and sat down next to Nick, causing him to open his eyes and jump slightly._

_"What are you doing home already?" Nick asked._

_"I c-came home to check on you...I was worried about you." Greg was looking down at the gun, not Nick._

_"Oh...go back to work, I'm fine."_

_Greg laughed humorlessly. "Are you kidding me? Do you think I'm blind? I can see you're laying here with a gun in your hand."_

_"It just makes me feel safer. Go back to work. Please." Nick had a sick desperation in his voice, and it was making Greg very nervous._

_"No." Greg said defiantly. "No, I'm staying right here. Talk to me Nick. What's wrong?"_

_Tears were now running down Nick's face and he shook his head slowly. "Please, you can't stay here when..." Nick trailed off and tried to push Greg away. "Just go."_

_Greg pushed Nick's hand away and shifted quickly so that he was sitting on top of Nick, straddling his hips. "No. Nick, you're really scaring me." Greg was trying to stay calm. If he started freaking out, Nick would too. "Give me the gun." Greg put his left hand on Nick's right wrist and squeezed it gently._

_Nick moved his arm away from Greg. "This hasn't been fair to you at all. You shouldn't have to deal with all of this, I can't ask you to be so strong for me. It'd be better if I-"_

_"Don't you dare finish that sentence." The tears were falling faster from Nick's eyes, and it was all Greg could do not to cry himself. "Nick, please give me the gun."_

_Nick shook his head slowly. "I can't do this anymore. I'm sick of being so scared and seeing you so scared too. I have to do this." Nick suddenly drew his hand up and under his chin, pressing the barrel of the gun there. Greg quickly grabbed Nick's wrist with both of his hands and yanked the gun away, forcing it into his own chest._

_"What the fuck do you think you're doing?! Stop being so crazy Nick! Let me help you. I can help you."_

_Nick tried to pull his hand away from Greg, put the medication he had to take made him groggy and not as strong as he usually was. "Greg, I gotta do this. If you love me, you'll let me do this."_

_Greg couldn't help it anymore. Tears were falling down his cheeks at an even higher rate than Nick. "That's not fair and you know it. You can't do this. Please just stop." He pressed the gun into his chest harder despite the pain the metal barrel caused. "If you're gonna do it, so am I." Nick tried, and failed, to pull the gun back again. "Go ahead Nick. This is going to solve everything."_

_"Greg, I don't want to hurt you. I could never hurt you. It's me I want to hurt."_

_"Don't you get it? If you're in pain, so am I. If you die, so do I." Greg stared down into Nick's eyes like it was the last time he was ever going to see him. Finally, Nick let go of the gun and closed his eyes as tightly as he could._

_Greg put the safety on the gun and threw it on the chair by the dresser. He put his hands on Nick's shoulders and put all of his weight there to make Nick's open his eyes. They were bloodshot from crying and have never looked so empty and sad before._

_"I'm sorry Greg...this just hurts so much and I know it's killing you too..."_

_Greg released his grip on Nick's shoulders. He moved one of his hands to Nick's chest, placing his hand over his racing heart. He threaded his fingers through Nick's soft hair with his other hand and smiled down sadly at his boyfriend._

_"I know this is hard. Just let me help you. Everything's gonna be okay. I promise."_

_Nick sat up so his lips were barely touching Greg's. "I love you so much."_

_"I love you too Nicky." Nick's slightly shaking right hand found the back of Greg's neck and pulled his lips to his own, drawing him into a deep kiss. They broke apart a few moments later. "Promise me you'll never leave me." Greg whispered._

_"I promise." Nick said as he brushed his lips against Greg's._

Greg woke up with a start and sat straight up. Something about that dream was...too real. It took him a few seconds to realize he was shivering. He suddenly had an impulse to lick his lips, and when he did he could taste Nick. _No way..._he thought to himself. _You're going crazy Greggo_.

His attention was drawn to the corner of the room, where a soft breeze was blowing the curtains hanging over the open window. Without giving it a second thought, Greg got up out of bed and shuffled over to the window, closing it immediatly. It wasn't until he was back under the covers that he rememberd closing that window before he had left for work the night before. _That's weird._ Greg put two and two together, and what he came up with made his heart race. _Nick came back..._


	7. Over Exposed Photo

Once Greg had come to his conclusion that Nick had come back, he couldn't fall back asleep. He couldn't even sit still. He jumped out of bed and paced around the bedroom until he started to feel confined and moved out into the living room. He was clutching his cell phone in his hand so tightly his knuckles were turning white. He finally convinced himself that it wasn't completely insane to call Nick. He flipped open his cell phone and held down the 1 key, activating his speed dial. But as soon as he heard the automated voice start to tell him the phone number he was trying to call was no longer in service, Greg snapped the phone shut. 

He stared down at his cell phone for a good couple of minutes before he lost it and threw it at the wall. Despite the fact that he had thrown it lefty because of his injured hand, the phone still smashed into more pieces than Greg could count. When the urge to slam his fist into the wall came on, Greg quickly went over to the couch and sat down so he wouldn't do any more damage than he had already done.

He rested his head in his good hand and bit his lip as tears spilled down his cheeks, running all the way down his neck and onto the collar of Nick's sweatshirt. He looked down at what he was wearing. His heart wrenched and he tore the sweatshirt off and threw it behind him. A million things were running through his mind and he couldn't think straight because of it. He was scared, sad, pissed off, tired, worried and frustrated all at once. The feeling was overwhelming.

As much as he didn't want to, Greg couldn't help himself from getting up off of the couch and heading over to the fridge, returning with a bottle of beer in his hand. As soon as the top was off Greg was guzzling down the cold liquid. He found comfort in the feeling of the smooth beer sliding down his throat. After his fifth one, his senses were dulled and he could easily pretend he didn't care about the fact that he didn't know where his boyfriend was, why he left, or if he was ever coming back.

Hours passed without Greg even realizing it. He had drank two six packs already and was polishing off his bottle of Vodka when Warrick came busting into the living room. Greg looked up at Warrick and smiled weakly.

"Hey...what's up?" His words were slurred and almost uncomprehendable.

"Greg, what the hell are you doing? Why didn't you answer your phone?" Warrick asked as he hurried over to the couch and grabbed the bottle from Greg's hands. He looked around at the abundance of empty beer bottles and noted that the bottle of Vodka in his hand was almost empty.

"Making everything go away..." Greg said quietly as his eyes slowly closed.

Warrick dropped the bottle onto to the floor and kneeled at Greg's side. "Greg, look at me." Greg forced his eyes open. "Have you thrown up at all?"

"Only a little." Greg said before he closed his eyes again.

Warrick checked Greg's pulse and started to panic slightly when he only felt a very faint pulsing. Greg's breathing was slow and ragged. Then suddenly, Greg started going into violent convulsions. He was having a seizure.

Warrick quickly dialed 911 and rattled off the address before dropping the phone and sitting Greg up. He didn't want him to choke if he started to throw up again. The convulsions soon wore off to a steady shaking just as the paramedics arrived. Greg was quickly strapped into the stretcher and put into the back of the amublance with Warrick right next to him.

"Hang in there Greg." Warrick said as he squeezed the younger CSIs hand gently.

"Tell Nick..." Greg was obviously forcing the words out and trying his hardest to make them understandable. "When he comes back...that I'm sorry for whatever I did...and I love him."

* * *

Warrick watched Greg through the glass window he was standing behind. The younger man did not look well at all. His eyes were sunken with dark circles underneath them. His skin was a lot paler than it should ever be and his lips were slightly blue colored. 

Warrick sighed heavily at the sight of one of his closest friends lying in a hospital bed with numerous tubes running to and from his body. He was so lost in his feeling of helplessness he didn't even hear the doctor walk up next to him.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Turner. Are you Nick Stokes?" The doctor asked as he looked down at the papers in his hand.

Warrick shook his head slowly. "No...I'm Warrick Brown." He corrected simply. Turner looked up at Warrick quickly, then looked back down as he shuffled through some papers before he was satisfied. Growing slightly impatient, Warrick asked, "Is Greg okay?"

"Now he is. He got here just in time. The seizures and slow breathing you described were due to alcohol poisoning. We had to pump his stomach, and luckily that got most of the alcohol out before it got into his bloodstream and caused some real damage."

Warrick nodded in understanding. "But he's gonna be okay?"

"He'll be fine. We're gonna keep him here overnight to make sure of it, but he should be able to go home tomorrow." Dr. Turner scribbled a few more notes on Greg's chart before looking back up at Warrick. "He's gonna be really tired and weak. Is someone going to be staying with him for a few days to make sure nothing happens?"

Warrick nodded again. "Yeah, I'm going to."

"Okay. I've also looked into getting him into some Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. I think it'd be best if he-"

Warrick politely cut Dr. Turner off. "No. He doesn't need to do that. He's not an alcoholic. This was a one time thing, it's never gonna happen again."

"Mr. Brown, it's better to be safe then-"

"He doesn't need to go to AA." Warrick stated firmly. "Can I see him now?"

Turner nodded slightly. "Yes...he should be waking up soon. He needs to get some rest though."

"Okay." Was all Warrick said before he walked away from Dr. Turner and through the door into where Greg was lying in the hospital bed. He silently pulled a chair up to the side of Greg's bed and sat there patiently, waiting for him to wake up. When he finally did, the sight wasn't any better than when Greg had been asleep.

The ex-lab rat's usually deep brown eyes were glazed over and empty looking. When Greg opened his eyes and saw Warrick sitting next to him, he turned away slighty and looked up at the ceiling, avoiding his eyes.

"Greg, look at me man." Warrick said softly.

Greg clenched his teeth as hard as he could and forced himself to make eye contact with Warrick. "I can't do this anymore Warrick." Greg's voice was strained and hoarse from being dry and throwing up.

"You're not quitting on me now so just forget about it."

"I'm not quitting on you. I'm quitting on him."

Warrick sighed. He knew exactly who Greg was talking about. It didn't take a genius to figure that one out. "You're too strong to just give in, you know that."

Greg shook his head. "You're wrong. I can very easily just give in and not care anymore. It's been three months. Everyone else has pretty much forgotten about him and moved on. Why can't I? I don't want to think about him anymore. I wanna just forget...I wanna forget him."

* * *

Nick Stokes lay completely still on his back, trying his hardest to ignore the searing pain shooting through his left arm. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to think of anything other than the amount of pain he was in right now. 

A fist came into contact with his face for what had to have been at least the tenth time that night. "Look at me." The voice was distant and quiet, but Nick still knew who it was. He could never forget that voice. "Open your eyes or I'll go kill him right now."

Nick immediatly opened his eyes and stared up at the blurry figure standing over him. "If you go near him, I'll fucking kill you." Nick choked out. His throat still hurt from having his windpipe almost squeezed shut.

Nick heard laughter from above him when his vision started to fade to black slowly. He knew he was going to pass out from the pain soon enough. "You better just keep being a good boy, and we won't hurt him. Only you." A picture was thrust into Nick's face and he could just barely make out the image. "You would't want the last thing he'd ever see to be your mangled body slowly dying right in front of his eyes, would you?"

Nick coughed up even more blood onto his bare chest and did everything he could not to black out at this point in time. "Just...leave him alone. He didn't do anything to you."

"Maybe we'll just toy with him a bit...maybe give him a few cuts and bruises to shake him up."

Nick shook his head as his eyes closed against his will. "No...Greg..." Was the last thing he said before he finally passed out.


	8. Listen

The words in italics are obviously from songs. The songs don't belong to me, they belong to A Change of Pace and The Goo Goo Dolls. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

Greg couldn't accurately say that Alex was a bad guy. He had never spoken one word to him. The fact that Alex Ryan was Nick's replacement was enough to make Greg hate him. It was clear Grissom did everything in his power to make sure the two never even had to see each other, let alone work together. The team had basically paired off. Warrick and Greg always worked together, Grissom and Catherine, and then Sara and Alex were mostly together. Warrick wanted nothing to do with his best friend's replacement either. 

So when Greg walked into the locker room to find Alex fastening his gun to his belt, he wasn't over joyed. He stopped dead in his tracks and hesistated for a moment before continuing on to his locker. He nodded slightly when he passed Alex, who smiled his hello. Greg sat down on the bench in front of his locker and ran his hand back and forth through his hair several times before the tension was cut slightly by Alex sitting down next to him.

"Look, I know you don't like me at all. And I honestly don't blame you, or Warrick. I understand this is really hard for you. I just wanted you to know I'm not trying to take over, cuz I know I could never do that."

Greg looked up at Alex in disbelief. The honesty in his voice was very unexpected. Greg sighed and smiled slightly. "I'm sorry I've ignored you and everything...it's just yo-"

"You don't have to apologize." Alex said, holding up a hand to silence Greg. "Believe me, I know what it's like to lose someone like you did. I'm not trying to become your best friend or anything, but I really do know what it's like."

"You do?" Greg asked.

Alex nodded. "Yeah. My girlfriend 'went out for milk' and never came back. Then after a year without anything, I transferred out here and I guess it really is a small world...she's a stripper out here now. I ran into her. At a restaurant, not a strip club." He added with a smile.

"I'm sorry to hear that. That must suck."

"Yeah...it does."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

Greg took a deep breath and sat up straight. "Does it ever get any easier? Not knowing if they're okay or not, or if they're ever coming back?"

Alex didn't want to lie to Greg, but he knew every situation was different then his was. "It took a long time for me to accept it. Then finally I realized I'm wasting my time sitting around waiting for her, and got on with my life." Greg nodded slowly, but Alex continued. "But I can tell there's something different with you. I've never met Nick, and this is the first time I've talked to you...but from what I've heard, you guys had something rare. I don't mean to like...sound weird or anything."

Greg laughed lightly. "No, it's okay. Better than what most people say."

"Don't listen to what most people say. People like to spread rumors cuz they bored with their own lives so easily."

"Especially Day Shift."

Alex laughed and nodded in agreement. "Yeah...no one's too fond of them are they?"

"No, everyone hates them. They're jerks."

"I've noticed." Alex took a good look at the younger guy sitting next to him, and really felt sorry for him. He was just a kid, and seemed like a really good guy. He hoped everything would work out for him. "Well, I gotta get back to the lab." He said as he stood and started walking toward the door.

Just as he was about to leave he was stopped by Greg. "Alex?" He turned and faced Greg. "Thanks."

"No problem." Alex said with a smile right before he left the locker room.

* * *

Nick slowly opened his eyes and waited patiently for his vision to clear. He had gotten very used to passing out and waking up who knows how much longer after. The fact that he had also gotten used to the constant pain he was in wasn't good either. He was honestly surprised he was still alive after all the blood he had lost and the damage that had been done to every part of his body. 

Breathing was almost impossible now due to all of his broken ribs and damage done to his windpipe too often. He could feel the life slowly draining out of his exhausted body. Any and all hope that he had once had was starting to slip away.

Despite his situation, Nick didn't care about himself right now. He knew that Greg was safe, and that was all he really cared about. What happened to him was irrelevant. As long as Greg was safe, everything was going to be just fine.

* * *

Greg sat in his Denali with the air conditioning on full plast as he waited for the red light to change to green. He was only half paying attention to the radio playing in the background of his thoughts. Then the DJ came back onto the air. 

"Now we have a kinda weird request...for two songs. The caller didn't leave his name, he seemed to be in a hurry. All he said was that whoever this is for would know and would be driving home from work right now. They must have a weird job if they're driving home at 9 in the morning." This caught Greg's attention. "Anyway, this is A Change of Pace's 'Vague Memory.' "

Greg's heart skipped a few beats when he heard the song come out of the speakers.

_Tears from yesterday carry on through tomorrow  
These words were too soft spoken and I don't want to regret anything  
No letter could express this fear I feel inside  
But I'll write it anyway  
Your name will be the last from my lips  
Your face the last image in my eyes  
Don't let the wind blow and take this all away  
Only in death will we rise_

Greg was shaken from his thoughts by the honking of a horn behind him. He noticed the light had turned green and quickly continued on his way home, but concentrated more on the song.

_I'll leave you these final words and pray for better days  
My voice a vague memory washed away by your tears  
It's hard to contemplate the obvious  
But you're strong enough to make it through_

_A poetic tragedy falls upon your doorstep as you wake  
Confide in your friends and family to wash this pain away  
Goodbyes are inevitable but I will see you again  
**And never forget the simple fact that I will always love you**_

Greg remembered the voicemail Nick had left him where he had said almost the exact same thing as the line in the song. Tears started to fall from his eyes as he listened to the song end and the DJ come back on.

"Great song...not played enough in my opinion. And now we have 'Let Love In' by the great Goo Goo Dolls.

_You wait, wanting this world  
To let you in  
And you stand there  
A frozen light  
In dark and empty streets  
You smile hiding behind  
A God-given face  
But I know you're so much more  
Everything they ignore  
Is all that I need to see  
_

Greg smiled through his tears as he remembered all the times Nick had sung this song to him to get him to fall back asleep after a nightmare. He didn't hear John Rzeznik's voice singing the song, he heard Nick's.

_You're the only one I ever believed in  
The answer that could never be found  
The moment you decided to let love in  
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel  
The end of fear is where we begin  
The moment we decided to let love in  
_

_I wish  
Wishing for you to find your way  
And I'll hold on for all you need  
That's all we need to say  
I'll take my chances while  
You take your time with  
This game you play  
But I can't control your soul  
You need to let me know  
You leaving or you gonna stay  
_

Greg could feel Nick lying next to him, running his hands through his hair and over his back, soothing him. He could smell him and hear his voice. He just couldn't see him.

_There's nothing we can do about  
The things we have to do without  
The only way to feel again  
Is let love in  
_

_There's nothing we can do about  
The things we have to live without  
The only way to see again  
Is let love in_

Greg choked back a sob as he pulled into his driveway and sat back in his chair. He closed his eyes and could see Nick holding him tightly, keeping him safe. His voice had never been clearer in his mind than it was right now.

_You're the only one I ever believed in  
The answer that could never be found  
The moment you decided to let love in  
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel  
The end of fear is where we begin  
The moment we decided to let love in_

_

* * *

_

The next chapter's going to be very, very short and will be up very, very soon. Thanks for the reviews.


	9. Can't Let It Go

Another song in this short chapter. It's "Your Guardian Angel" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.

* * *

Greg had been lying on his couch for the last two hours. He was hungary, but didn't feel like eating. He was exhausted, but couldn't fall asleep. All he could think about was Nick. For the past couple of weeks, he had been trying to forget about him and everything to do with him and move on. Now how was he supposed to?

Greg dragged himself up off the couch and over to his computer to check his e-mail. His cousin had been e-mailing him a lot lately, and so had Matt. There was surprisingly nothing from either of them, but he did have one e-mail in his junk box.

After his laptop scanned the file quickly to make sure it wasn't a virus, Greg opened it. There was a blue link to click on next to instructions to make sure that the volume was on. After turning up his speakers a little bit, Greg clicked on the link and waited.

Soon enough, music drifted through the speakers. He recognized the song immediatly. He could make an educated guess at who had sent him this. It was scary how the words seemed to explain everything, yet still leave him so confused.

_When I see your smile  
Tears run down my face I can't replace  
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out  
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul  
And I know I'll find deep inside me  
I can be the one_

_I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_It's ok. It's ok. It's ok.  
Seasons are changing  
And waves are crashing  
And stars are falling all for us  
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter  
I can show you I'll be the one_

Greg almost fell out of his chair when he heard the knock. His heart rate skyrocketed and he quickly went over to the door. He stood comepletely still for a few seconds with his hand on the doorknob, contemplating what to do. If he opened it and it wasn't who he was hoping it was, it might literally kill him. Then he heard the sweetest voice in the world. At first he thought it was just in his head, but then he realized it was really coming from the other side of the door.

"I will never let you fall...I'll stand up with you forever...I'll be there for you through it all...even if saving you sends me to heaven...cuz you're my true love, my whole heart..."

Greg threw the door open to reveal Nick leaning up against the door frame. Greg was so overwhelmed at the sight of him that he didn't immediatly realize the condition Nick was in. His face was bruised, as was his neck and arms. His shirt was ripped and bloody from the numerous cuts on his chest and abs. But Greg was so lost in Nick's eyes, he barely noticed.

Nick smiled as best as he could at his boyfriend. "Hi." He said weakly before he crumpled to the floor and collapsed at Greg's feet.

_Use me as you will  
Pull my strings just for a thrill  
And I know I'll be ok  
Though my skies are turning gray_

_I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

* * *

Sorry for the cliffhanger. I promise any and all questions you have about where Nick was and everything will be answered in the next couple of chapters. 


	10. Stay With You

Greg stared down at Nick, unable to move or speak. It took him a good couple of minutes to realize that Nick needed help, and fast. Once he snapped out of his trance, he kneeled beside Nick and brought him back to consciousness. 

"Nicky? Wake up...come on Nick wake up." Greg said as he gently shook Nick's shoulder and held his head up off of the floor in his lap.

Nick's eyes slowly opened and he looked up at Greg, the smile returning to his lips. "Hi." Nick said again. His voice was barely above a whisper.

Greg couldn't stop himself from smiling. "Hi." He shifted so he could help Nick get back on his feet, which was no easy task. He was obviously in pain and only half awake. He somehow managed to get Nick into the bathroom, undressed, and into the shower without too much hassle.

Greg was speechless at all of the bruises, cuts, scrapes, burns, and scars that were covering Nick's body. He was holding Nick steady by having him lean on the bathroom wall for support as he stood on the other side. Once he was under the warm water, Greg noticed he still had his jeans and t-shirt on and he was getting soaked. But he stopped caring when Nick started leaning on him for support instead of the wall.

"What happened to you?" Greg whispered against Nick's neck as the older man wrapped his arms around Greg's waist and pulled him as close to his own body as he could. Greg tried to pull back when he felt Nick wince in pain, but Nick wouldn't let him go. So instead Greg folded his arms around Nick's neck and closed his eyes.

"Nothing, I'm fine." Nick said as he kissed Greg's neck lightly.

"I'm not an idiot Nick."

"I know, you're actually a genius." Nick moved his kissing down Greg's neck and to his collarbone.

"Where were you?" Greg asked. He had to try very hard to keep his voice from breaking and tears from falling from his eyes.

Nick spun them around so he was gently pinning Greg between himself and the cold tile wall. He kissed his way back up Greg's neck and over to his mouth, capturing Greg's lips in a breathtaking kiss. Nick pulled back slightly so his lips were barely touching Greg's. "I was protecting you."

"From what?" Greg said. "I'm fine, I never was in any danger. Why did you leave me?" Greg couldn't help it anymore. His voice cracked as tears started rolling down his face.

Nick swallowed the lump in his throat and kissed away Greg's tears as best he could. "I'm so sorry sweetie." Was all Nick could say.

Greg shook his head slowly and dropped his eyes away from Nick's. "It was so hard not knowing where you were...then I thought you came back and then the songs...I really wish I could hate you for this. I hate that I can't hate you. I love you so much it hurts." Greg wrapped his arms around Nick's neck tighter and rested his head on Nick's shoulder.

As much as standing, being awake and pressing Greg up against him was hurting Nick right now, seeing how he had hurt Greg was so much worse. Nothing was more painful to Nick than seeing Greg crying because of him. It was unbearable. Nick's own tears dripped from his eyes and ran down his cheeks. "I love you too Greg...I'm sorry I hurt you...that was never my intention."

Greg pulled his head off of Nick's shoulder and looked him in the eyes. "It doesn't matter. Regardless of everything that happened...I just can't live without you."

* * *

Getting Nick dressed was harder than it had been to get him into the shower. He was so exhausted and wasn't much help. But finally Greg had gotten him into clean boxers, his own sweatpants, and a t-shirt. He let Nick lean on him as he threw the covers on the bed to the side. He firmly yet gently but his hands on Nick's hips and carefully let him fall backwards onto the bed. After getting his legs up into the bed as well, Greg threw the blankets back over Nick and turned to leave. He would have too, if Nick hadn't grabbed his hand and pulled him back. 

"Stay with me." He said weakly.

"I..." Greg started, but couldn't think of the right words to say.

Nick forced his tired eyes to stay open. "I know you hate me. I don't blame you for it. But please...I need you Greggo."

Greg let Nick hold onto his hand. He didn't have the will to pull it away. "I don't hate you Nick. I never could. I just...this is hard. You suddenly being gone then coming back and everything..."

Nick pulled on Greg's hand as hard as he could, causing the younger man to fall onto the bed. He thankfully landed to the right of Nick and not on him. Nick wrapped his right arm around Greg's shoulder with a groan of pain and held on to his hand. "I'm staying with you." He said softly. He kissed Greg's forhead gently and smiled at his boyfriend.

"I hate it when you do that." Nick furrowed his brow in confussion. "How can I not trust you with that smile?"

Nick smiled wider and kissed Greg sweetly. "You need to trust me on something else." Greg nodded slightly. "I love you more than anything. Everything I do, I do it for you. I would do anything to keep you safe because I love you so much."

Greg smiled slightly and kissed Nick again. "Okay, I trust you." He snuggled against Nick and carefully rested his head on Nick's chest. "I couldn't sleep much without you."

Nick kissed the top of Greg's head and closed his eyes. "You're then only one I ever believed in...the answer that could never be found." He started, singing Greg to sleep. "The moment you decided to let love in...I'm banging on the door of an angel...the end of fear is where we begin...the moment we decided to let love in."

In all honesty, Greg laying on him the way he was right now was causing Nick a lot of pain. But he didn't care at all. He knew it would have hurt so much more if Greg had walked away, or if he had never gotten the chance to do this ever again. He was well aware he probably needed to go to a hospital, but had talked Greg out of forcing him to go. All he wanted to do was lie here with him for as long as possible and know Greg was safe.


	11. Truth Is

Nick opened his eyes slowly, and for a second didn't know where he was. Then when his surroundings set in, he relaxed and stretched out his arm as far as he could without it hurting too much. But Greg wasn't there. Nick couldn't help the panic from rising and he looked around the room quickly to see if he was there. When he didn't see him and knew he wouldn't be able to get up, Nick called out to him.

"Greg?" He yelled as loud as he could, which wasn't very loud. He tried his best to keep the panic out of his voice. When there was no response after a couple of seconds, Nick started to force himself out of the bed. The Greg came into the room and hurried over to his side, pushing him gently back in.

"Don't try to get up, I don't want you to get hurt any more than you already are." He sat down on the bed next to Nick and ran his hand over Nick's hair. "What's wrong?"

Nick smiled up at Greg. "Nothing...nothing now. I just didn't know where you were and wanted to make sure you're okay."

"I'm fine Nick." Greg said, matching Nick's smile. "You're the one who needs to go to a hospital. Whatever happened to you wasn't good, you need medical help."

Nick slid his hand into Greg's and shook his head. "No I don't. All I need is you."

Greg rubbed the side of Nick's hand with his thumb. "It's really not fair how you always do that ya know."

"I know."

"So are you ever going to tell me where the hell you've been for the last three and a half months or am I just supposed to guess?"

Nick sighed. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me." Greg said with a shrug.

"Okay..." Nick gave in. He looked up at Greg, but his attention was drawn away from his boyfriend and his eyes drfited behind him. "Fuck."

Greg shook his head in confussion. "What?"

Nick closed his eyes and squeezed Greg's hand. "Fuck." He opened his eyes and looked back up at Greg. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do this. I just wanted to see you again."

"Nick, what the hell are you talki-" Greg was cut off by the feeling of something cold and hard being pressed into the back of his neck. Tears started to fall from Nick's eyes, which did nothing to ease Greg's fear.

"Get off the bed." A strangely familiar voice said from behind Greg. Greg obeyed and reluctantly released his grip from Nick's hand. He allowed whoever was holding the gun to push him away from the bed. Once he was facing the wall, he was spun around and pushed against it. Greg couldn't believe his eyes when he saw who was in their house, holding a gun, and now walking over to Nick.

"Don't even think about moving." Nigel Crane said over his shoulder to Greg as he took his seat next to Nick. He shook his head slowly as he forced the gun into Nick's mouth and pushed it in as far as he could until it was pressing against the back of Nick's throat.

"I told you...to never think about trying to escape. But, you did. And you were stupid enough to come here." Nigel smiled humorlessly and shrugged. "You want me to hurt him, don't you?"

Nick tried to shake his head 'no', but the gun in his mouth wouldn't let him. He was struggling to breathe and wouldn't look at Greg. Greg stared at Nick, hoping for him to look back, but he never did. Nigel removed the gun from Nick's mouth and instead pressed it into Nick's left collarbone, causing Nick to yell out in pain and try to flinch away.

"What would be worse...me killing you, right here and now in front of your little boyfriend...or doing the _unthinkable_ to him in front of you?" Nigel asked with an evil smile.

Nick's breathing was ragged and painful. "If you touch him...I **will** kill you. I told you...you could do whatever you want to me...just leave him alone." He was trying to catch his breath, but wasn't succeeding as well as he had hoped.

"That was the original plan, yes. Then you dedicate songs over the radio and run away...I think that deserves some more punishment." Nigel stood up and walked over to Greg, who was still looking at Nick. He turned his attention to Crane though when the gun was put up against the side of his head. Nick painfully turned his head so he could see, even though he really didn't want to.

"Have you told him the truth?" Nigel asked Nick.

Nick shook his head. "I didn't tell him anything. This has nothing to do with Greg, so get the fuck away from him right now." Nick was trying to get up, but he knew he wasn't going to be able to.

"Wouldn't it be better if you told him what you did, instead of me telling him after I put a bullet in your brain? Or maybe I should just show him the pictures..."

"What I did? How about what you made me do. I only did it so you'd stay away from him and you know that."

"Nick...what the hell is going on?" Greg asked. His voice was surprisingly steady depsite their current situation.

"You better tell him Nick. Clear your conscious."

Nick shook his head. "I don't know what you want me to say to him. I didn't do anything!"

Nigel was clearly getting impatient. "You know what I want you to tell him. If you do, I promise to leave Greg here alone." When Nick didn't say anything and closed his eyes, Nigel went over to Nick, leaned down and whispered something in his ear. After he was done, he stood back up and crossed his arms, waiting.

Nick opened his eyes, looking first at Nigel then at Greg. He opened and closed his mouth several times before finally saying what he was forced to. "Greg, I...I had sex with someone while I was gone. She was...I didn't even like it...I...I'm sorry G."

Greg knew better than to say it out loud, but he knew there was more to that story than what Nigel had told Nick to say. He could tell there was something else. "It's okay Nick...I don't care."

That didn't sit too well with Nigel. "Oh, you don't? You don't care that while you were all alone, crying over him, he was out fucking some blonde and not even thinking about you?"

"Bullshit!" Nick yelled at Nigel. "He's all I ever thought about, which is what really pissed you off isn't it? You can beat me, threaten to kill me, force me to have sex with anyone you want...but I'm never gonna stop thinking about him. I'm never gonna stop loving him."

That made Nigel completely lose it. He slammed the handle of the gun right above Nick's right eye as hard as he could, almost knocking Nick out cold. "I tried to help you Nick...I really did. But you just wouldn't listen to me. It's too late now."

Nick watched as the blurry image that was supposed to be Nigel Crane walked over to Greg. Just as Nigel raised the gun and pointed it at Greg, Nick blacked out.

* * *

Sorry for another cliff hanger. Next chapter will be up soon. 


	12. Voice in the Dark

If anyone's confused, Nigel Crane is Nick's stalker from season 2. Not the guy from Fraiser. Enjoy )

* * *

Nick didn't want to open his eyes for fear of what he might see. He could feel warm blood flowing from the cut above his eye, which meant he hadn't been knocked out for too long. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around him. He was in some type of building project. The walls were bare and there was no furniture except for the metal pole he was handcuffed to. The floor was solid concrete covered in a lay layer of dust. He was sitting with his back against the pole and his hands cuffed together behind him. Once his eyes finally adjusted to the dim light, relief washed over him when he saw Greg on the other side of the room.

At first he didn't see Nigel, but then he came into view from somewhere off to Greg's right. The gun was in his hand, and Nick could see his blood on it. He fought against the metal handcuffs as hard as he could when Nigel stood next to Greg and ran the barrel of the gun along Greg's neck and shoulders. Nick felt his wrists cut open and blood pour out from the cuts and over his fingers, but he didn't care.

"Glad to see you're awake Nick...didn't want you to miss this." Right on cue, another man came into the room. It didn't take a genius to see that Nigel and this other guy had to be related. "Greg, this is my younger brother Ethan."

Ethan grabbed Greg by the back of his neck and dragged him towards Nick, throwing him to the floor two feet in front of Nick. Nick fought harder against his restraints, but all he was able to do was cut into his flesh deeper. Greg just layed there in front of him almost completely still. His chest was moving up and down very slowly and looked weak.

"What did you do to him?" Nick asked Nigel, but didn't take his eyes off Greg.

"Just gave him a mild sedative to make this a little easier. We don't need him to be a fighter like you were." Nigel answered.

Nick's mouth fell open in shock as he realized what was happening. Ethen lowered himself onto Greg's lap so he was straddling his waist. Greg barely reacted. Ethen violently tore off Greg's shirt before moving down and beginning to unbutton his faded jeans.

"No!" Nick choked out through the tears that had built up. "No...please don't...just leave him alone. You c-can't do that to him..."

"Shut up Nick. Ethan's not going to hurt him." Nigel said as he watched his younger brother finish taking off Greg's jeans before standing up and taking a few steps back. Greg had had his eyes closed for the entire time, but now he opened them and looked over at Nick. The look in his eyes was enough to shatter Nick's heart. "You're going to."

Nick tore his eyes away from Greg's and looked up at Nigel. "What?"

Nigel nodded and smiled wickedly. "That's right." He handed the gun to Ethan and made his way over to Nick. He kneeled down behind him and unlocked the handcuffs. "Stand up Nick." When he didn't obey, Ethan pointed the gun at Greg and cocked it.

"Okay." Nick said quietly as he stood slowly. His legs were shaking and he felt like he was going to collapse at any minute. Without warning, his sweatpants and t-shirt were stripped from his body and cast aside.

"Now, we shouldn't have to tell you what to do. You're a big boy."

Nick shook his head slowly. "No...I can't hurt him like that." The tears that had built up in his eyes were now falling down his face.

Nigel rolled his eyes and pushed Nick forward, making him lose his balance. Nigel kicked the back of Nick's left knee, causing him to fall forward and land on Greg. The only thing that kept Nick from completely covering Greg was Nick holding himself up by his shaking arms.

"Come on Nick...we all know you want to." Ethan said as he pressed the gun into the back of Nick's head and tried to force him down onto Greg.

Nick looked down into Greg's deep brown eyes. He could see how scared he was. He had that same look in his eyes when he had told Nick about what his ex-boyfriend Jeremy had done to him. Nick had promised he would never, ever do that to Greg or take advantage of him. He wasn't about to start now.

Nick leaned his head down and kissed Greg's sweet spot on his jaw, right below his left ear. "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise sweetie." He whispered before pulling back and looking Greg in the eyes again. He pressed his lips against Greg's and was slightly surprised when Greg started kissing him back. Nick pulled away against the gun Ethan was holding smiled down at Greg. "I'm not going to do that to you."

Ethan hit Nick in the back of the head with the barrel of the gun. "Are you shy or something? We'll cover our eyes." He said with a sarcastic laugh.

"Maybe that's not his problem. Maybe the thought of having sex with a guy disgusts Nick and he doesn't want to have anything to do with him." Nigel said.

Nick's arms were shaking violently from the weight he was putting on them and the pain was excrutiating. "Or maybe it's the fact that there's nothing you can do to make me rape my boyfriend." Nick said as he felt the gun leave the back of his head.

"What about to save his life?" Ethan asked.

What Greg had been given was slowly starting to wear off. He put his hands on Nick's chest and gently pushed against him. "Nicky, please don't hurt me...I hate being hurt like that..." He whispered.

Nick closed his eyes as the tears started to fall from his eyes. "I won't G."

"Then the kid dies." Nigel said simply.

Ethan crouched down next to Greg's head and pressed the gun against Greg's temple. Nick opened his eyes and shook his head. He could feel Greg shaking beneath him and wanted nothig more than to just make everything stop.

"Fuck...no...just leave him alone! Kill me, I don't care."

"Nick, I'm warning you." Nigel said.

"Fuck you." Nick said through clenched teeth. He rolled off of Greg and onto his back. He had to bite his lip so he wouldn't yell out in pain. He felt around on the floor until he found Greg's hand and squeezed it gently. "Everything's gonna be okay...I won't let them hurt you."

"I've had enough of this bullshit!" Nigel yelled. He reached down and grabbed Greg's left arm and dragged him away from Nick. He had to pull pretty hard to separate their hands. He forced Greg up against the pole and handcuffed him where Nick had been. Then he went back to Nick.

He reached down and grabbed a fistful of Nick's hair and pulled him up by it so he was sitting up as straight as he could. After punching him in the face a couple of times and screaming at him, he pulled a knife from his pocket and held the blade under Nick's chin.

"I tried to show you how good you had it so you could make a better life for yourself. But you just wouldn't listen to me. You think you're in love. You don't know what love is Nick."

"And you do?" Nick said in between gasping breaths. He could feel all the pain slowly dulling, telling him he was going to pass out. And this time, he doubted he would wake up again.

"I thought I did, but I was just as stupid as you are." He slid the knife down Nick's neck and over his chest, all the way down to the elastic of his boxers. "You weren't that much of a man anyway." He sliced the blade across Nick's skin, right above his abdomen. Blood spilled out from the thin but deep cut and ran all the way down Nick's left leg. He didn't flinch at all.

"As you're slowly bleeding to death, I want you to have to look at the corpse of the one you think you love." Nigel turned is back to Nick and walked over to Ethan, extending his hand for the gun. But when he turned around, Nick had somehow managed to crawl his way over to Greg and was leaning back against him.

"You're not going to hurt him." Nick said defiantly.

"Get out of the way Nick!" Nigel yelled.

"No."

"Please get out of the way Nicky...you've done enough already." Greg pleaded. He was trying to push Nick off of him, but it was very difficult without his hands.

"I'm not moving. Go ahead, shoot me."

Nigel raised the gun and pointed it at Nick's chest. "Move." Nick shook his head and closed his eyes. His head was spinning and he couldn't hear much of anything. He didn't even hear the gunshot or the police sirens. All he could hear was Greg scream his name.

The next thing he knew, he was laying flat on his back again. He opened his eyes and Greg was the only thing he saw. There was a throbbing pain in his stomach and he felt like he was going to throw up. Despite all that, he smiled up at Greg.

"Listen to me Greg..." His voice wasn't much above a whisper.

"Shhh...the ambulance is on its way...just relax." Greg said as he brushed his hand back and forth through Nick's hair.

"No...you need to listen to me...no matter what anyone says, I did this for you, okay? I love you...so much..."

Greg swallowed the lump in his throat and smiled down at Nick. "I know. Save it for later, you're gonna be okay."

Out of the corner of his eye, Nick saw the blurry image he recognized as Warrick come into view. But he couldn't understand what he was saying.

Against his will, his eyes closed and everything went black and silent.

* * *

Next chapter should be up soon. Thanks for the reviews. 


	13. For What It's Worth

Greg sat on the back of the ambulance wrapped up in a blanket. He was shaking from fear more than then cold. His clothes, along with Nick's, had been bagged as evidence and taken back to the lab. Not that they would need much evidence. Warrick had ran in on Nigel holding the gun and staring wide-eyed at Nick. Greg had wanted to go in the ambulance with Nick, but he had been forced to stay back. The paramedics had thouroughly checked him out and made sure he was okay. Physically he was. It was the emotional damage that was killing him. 

The police had tried to question him, but he wouldn't talk to anyone. Warrick had to have Brass practically fight them all back. Greg had finally been left alone for a few minutes. But now that he was by himself, he didn't want to be anymore. That's when Warrick came over.

"You alright man?" He asked quietly as he jumped up onto the back of the ambulance next to Greg.

Greg shook his head slowly. "No...he...they tried to make him...then they..." Greg couldn't formulate a comeplete thought at the moment.

"It's gonna be alright Greg." Warrick said as he wrapped his arm around Greg's shaking shoulders. "Nick's gonna be okay because you saved him."

"I just got lucky I was able to text you without them seeing. I'm surprised you even got it cuz I had to use my old phone cuz I broke my other one..."

"It doesn't matter. If you hadn't done what you did and kept Nick sane in there, he wouldn't be alive right now and you know that."

"I'm just so sared." Greg whispered.

"I know. It's okay to be scared. I'm scared too. But everything's gonna be okay. We got both Cranes and Nick's gonna be fine."

"What if he isn't? He was in such bad shape then got shot...what if he dies?"

Warrick didn't answer, because that's what he was afraid of too. He knew Nick had lost a lot of blood and was very weak. You could tell he had been through hell just by looking at him. He knew Nick was mentally tough enough to pull through this. It was the physical part he was scared about.

"They didn't even want to try and kill Nick. They wanted to kill me." Greg said.

"Because they know he loves you."

"They wanted to help him or something..." Greg shook his head and looked down at the ground. "They tried to make him rape me."

Warrick hoped he had heard Greg wrong. "What?"

"When Nick was knocked out...they gave me some sedative or something...and when Nick off they took of our clothes and told him if he didn't do it they'd kill him...Nigel beat him up more than went to kill me but Nick wouldn't fucking move out of the way..." Greg trailed off as his voice broke and tears started running down his cheeks.

"Nick didn't hurt you, did he?"

Greg shook his head and looked up at Warrick. "No, he wouldn't do it." He swallowed down a sob and bit the inside of his cheek. He didn't know why he said what he did next, but he did. "I thought he was going to."

"Why?"

"I don't know...Jeremy did, and I never thought he would either. Nick had a gun to his head, and it wasn't like I was going to fight him off or anything. And he still wouldn't do it."

Warrick smiled slightly. "Well, that's Nick for ya."

* * *

Finally, after hours of being at that half built house in Henderson, Greg was in the car with Warrick on the way to Desert Palms Hospital. He was completely exhausted from the events of the last couple of days and didn't try to fight off sleep as he rested his head against the window and let his eyes close. 

Warrick was glad he was getting some rest so he could relax and stop worrying about Nick so much. Warrick could do that now. This was the third time he had to drive out to the hospital to see if his best friend was going to be okay. Each time, the situation had gotten worse. He was trying not to think about what Greg had asked him. He didn't want to think about Nick dying.

Warrick was so lost in his thoughts he didn't really realize that they had finally gotten to the hospital until he had parked and turned off the Denali. He shook Greg's shoulder gently.

"Wake up man, we're at the hospital."

"I'm not asleep." Greg said. His voice was quite and heavy like he had been sleeping even though he said he hadn't been. "I...I don't want to see him...like that..." Greg whispered.

"I don't blame you. You don't have to go in, we can stay here or I can take you home."

Greg closed his eyes again. "But I don't want him to be alone...I don't know what to do..." He shook his head slowly before looking over at Warrick. "Let's go in...I need to know if he's gonna be okay."

Warrick nodded slowly. "Okay. Let's go."

The walk from the parking lot into the hospital seemed like it was going in slow motion to Greg. He wanted to run and see Nick, but at the same time he wanted to just collapse where he was and sleep for a very long time. Once he stepped inside the hospital, everything he hated about it hit him like a ton of bricks. The smell, bright lights, and the feeling of the insanely clean air surrounded him. He knew it was all in his head, but everytime he was here, he could smell burning plastic and his back started to hurt. But memories of the lab explosion were the last thing on Greg's mind right now.

Greg concentrated all his attention and energy on just following Warrick. He didn't pay any attention to what the lady at the front desk or the nurses were saying. He didn't look around at all the people waiting because he knew that's all he would be doing for quite some time. Just waiting.

He snapped out of his trance when he saw an older looking doctor walk up to them and shake Warrick's hand before doing the same with him. He had missed the opening introductions, but read the doctor's name tag: 'Dr. Leavell.'

"Is Nick gonna be okay?" Warrick asked. He had been extremely calm finding out where Nick was and talking to all the necessary people. But now Greg could hear the desperation in his voice.

"It's far too early to say for sure. Nick has been through a lot of physical trauma. I honestly don't understand how he's still alive. He has countless broken bones, internal bleeding, his windpipe is half the size it should be, there's not an inch of skin that isn't cut, bruised, or scarred, and he's been drugged or poisoned numerous times."

"You did a tox that fast?" Greg asked.

"No, but we should be gettting that back very soon. He has needle marks in his left arm. They look fairly recent, some more than others. And unless he was a heroin addict..."

Warrick shook his head. "He wasn't...he was kidnapped and tortured for the last three and a half months."

Dr. Leavell nodded slowly. "We're doing everything we can to save him. I'll keep you updated as much as possible. Right now he's in critical condition, and I'll be sure to let you know if and when that changes. He's in surgery right now...it's going to be a while."

Warrick and Greg nodded weakly as Leavell went back to doing whatever he was before they had showed up. Greg sank into the chair up against the wall behind him and tried not to lose whatever he had left of his sanity at this point.

"How long do you think it's gonna be?" Greg asked.

Warrick shook his head. "I don't know man...probably a really long time." He watched as Greg hung his head and closed his eyes. He wished there was something more he could do for his friend, but he knew all it would take was for Nick to make it out of this okay. "I'll tell ya what...I'll take you home so you can shower and get some rest, maybe eat something...and when I find out more I'll call you or if you want to come back I can just go and get you."

Greg nodded slowly as he sat up straight and looked at Warrick. "Okay...I don't want to leave him alone but I can't just sit here..."

"It's okay Greg, Nick's never gonna be alone."

* * *

Greg had to admit that he felt a lot better after eating a sandwich and taking a nice hot shower. He had fresh sweatpants and an old t-shirt on. Now all that was left before he could curl up into bed for a little while was Nick's sweatshirt. And for some reason, it wasn't behind the couch where he had last remembered leaving it. It didn't take him long to find it hanging up behind the door where it belongs. 

"How the hell did that get there?" Greg thought out loud. He didn't really care. He just shrugged and took the sweatshirt off the hanger and pulled it over his head. After his arms were through the sleeves, he felt something in the front pocket. He reached inside and pulled out a folded up piece of paper with his name written on it. "Not again..." He said to himself, remembering the last time he had gotten a note.

Knowing it was from Nick was enough to convince Greg to read it. He walked over to the bed and snuggled under the covers before opening the piece of paper and reading it.

_Greg,_

_You're reading this either because I'm sitting right next to you, or you're addicted to my sweatshirt. Either way, where I am doesn't matter. Because if you're reading this, that means you're safely at home, at that's all that really matters to me._

_I know you're so confused about everything that's happened, so I should probably explain some of it. A couple weeks before our anniversary, I noticed a guy that looked a lot like Nigel Crane following me around a lot. I thought it was all in my head, until he talked to me. He told me not to say anything to anyone or else he would kill you. I didn't think it was worth the chance of you getting hurt, so that's why I never said anything. I didn't know what they were planning to do, but I figured it wouldn't be good. That's why I was acting so weird...I wanted you to know the truth about me so if anything happened you'd be able to move on._

_I'm really sorry I was gone for so long, but you have to believe me it was because I was trying to protect you from them hurting you. I didn't care what they did to me as long as you were safe. Nigel told me how upset you were, and I swear that knowing I hurt you and made you cry hurt more than anything they could have done to me. I never wanted you to get hurt and I'm sorry that you did because of me._

_Whatever they say or show you, none of it meant anything. Anything they made me do I did for you, even if it seems like the opposite. Don't listen to what Nigel, Ethan, or anyone else says to you. This isn't your fault and I love you more than you could ever understand._

_I know that doesn't explain too much, but none of it really matters that much anyway. All you need to know is that I love you and would do anything for you. I don't care what it takes...I would die if it meant you would be safe and happy._

_I love you so much G_

_Nick_

The tears didn't start falling from Greg's eyes until he was completely finished with the letter. Once they started, he doubted they were going to stop anytime soon. His heart was aching and all he wanted to do was kiss Nick and tell him he loved him too. He never got a chance to say that. If that was the last thing he ever did, he wouldn't care.

Greg closed his eyes and let his head sink into the soft pillows. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. _Nick has to be okay._ He thought to himself. _He's gonna be fine...he has to be._

"I love you Nick." Greg whispered right before he fell asleep, still holding the letter in his hands.

* * *

Thanks for the reviews. Next chapter shouldn't be too far away. 


	14. Falling Away

After getting some much needed rest and some more food, Greg was dressed and back at the hospital sitting in the uncomfortable plastic chairs next to Warrick. The letter Nick had written him was tucked away in his wallet in the back pocket of his jeans. He had read it so many times he had it memorized and kept playing the words over and over in his mind. All he wished was that Nick would have explained more. But he was more concerned with whether or not his boyfriend was going to still be alive within the next few hours. 

"How long has it been?" Greg asked Warrick as he stared down at the pale tiles on the floor.

Warrick looked at his watch and sighed. "Going on 11 hours. They should know more by now." That thought made Greg's heart skip a beat. _What if they did know more, but didn't want them to know? What if they know Nick's going to die and are waiting to try and make it less painful or something?_ Warrick could see Greg was starting to freak out by the look in his eyes and the shaking of his hands. "Don't worry man. Nick's gonna be okay. Just hang in there for him, we'll know something more soon."

As if on cue in a bad movie, Dr. Leavell appeared from around the corner. The look on his face was nothing close to comforting and only worsened Greg's fear.

"Fuck." He said as Leavell came closer and he could see the look of sympathy in his eyes. Greg somehow managed to stand up and shake hands with the doctor before blurting out, "Is he okay?"

Dr. Leavell took a deep breath and motioned back to the seats behind the two standing men. "I think you should have a seat." Greg sank back into the chair and covered his face with his hands. The lump in his throat made it hard to breathe and tears stung his eyes. He didn't want to hear what he was dreading Leavell was going to say.

"What's going on?" Warrick asked. His voice was weak and full of fear.

"We found out what Nick had been poisoned with. Ant venom had been injected into his blood stream, along with cocaine, heroin and other drugs. This caused severe damage to his heart and lungs. We managed to stop all the internal bleeding and remove the bullet from his chest and left collar bone...but..." Leavell trailed off for a second to chose his words carefully. "He had a heart attack while he was still in surgery. His heart stopped for three minutes..." Greg's head snapped up and he looked up at the doctor through tear filled eyes. "But we were able to bring him back...we just don't know for how long."

"What are his chances?" Warrick asked. He was surprised he was somehow able to find his voice.

"A valve in his heart isn't working anymore and is affecting the aorta. We would have to go in and do open heart surgery to correct it. The only problem is we would have to stop his heart and have it connected to a machine to keep him alive. Once we take him off the machine, his heart may be too weak to start beating on its own again."

"What are his chances?" Warrick repeated himself.

Dr. Leavell sighed slightly. "Not good...about a hundred thousand to one if we do the surgery."

Warrick nodded slowly. "And without it?"

"He probably won't make it through the rest of the week."

_That's only two days._ Greg thought to himself. _How can this be happening?_ The tears were overflowing from his eyes and he could feel his heart sinking deeper and deeper into his stomach.

"You're listed as his power of attorney...the surgery's your call." Dr. Leavell said to Warrick.

Warrick put his hand on Greg's shoulder and squeezed it gently. Greg looked at Warrick and forced himself to hold back a sob. "It's as much your decision as it is mine Greg. What do you think?"

Greg swallowed a few times so he would be able to speak. He looked back down at the floor. "Is surgery his only chance at living?" He could see Leavell nod out of the corner of his eye. He clenched his teeth together and closed his eyes. He was quiet for a minute before finally answering. "Then let him die."

* * *

Greg felt like someone was trying to rip his ribs out of his chest. He had already thrown up everything in his stomach. The last three minutes had been nothing but endless, painful dry heaves. Once they finally stopped, Greg fell back against the wall of the bathroom stall and panted frantically as he tried to catch is breath.

He closed his eyes when he felt the sting of tears once again. He threaded his shaky fingers through is damp hair and bit his lip so he wouldn't scream. He couldn't believe what he had said out in the hallway. He knew why he had said it...he just wished he hadn't meant it.

He opened his eyes and looked to his right when he heard the bathroom door open and close. He knew it was going to be Warrick even before the older man had kneeled next to him with a worried look in his eyes.

"Are you okay man?" Warrick asked quietly.

Greg shook his head. "No. I just said that I want Nick to die. I don't...that's not what I meant...I just want him to...it's not fair...fuck." The small sobs that rocked his body did nothing to help with Greg's fast paced breathing at the moment.

"I know you didn't mean it." Warrick said soothingly.

"Yes I did." Greg whispered. "I don't want him to suffer anymore because of me. He did whatever the hell he did for me...to save me. I'm just...trying to save him."

"From what?" Warrick asked before he could think.

"From me." Greg choked out. "Even though I don't understand why he was gone, I'm still so pissed about it. It hurt so much...and I know he's in a lot of pain right now. I don't want him to suffer anymore...I don't want him to feel any pain."

Warrick wasn't sure what to say, but he knew he had to say something. "You can't feel responsible for what's happened to Nick. It's not your fault. I'm sure of that even though we don't have the full story yet."

Greg shook his head slowly. "I'm so confused...I don't know what to do."

"It's simple." Warrick said. "Do you love him enough to give him a chance to make up for hurting you?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah...I do. I want to see him again and everying...I'm just afriad he's lying to me again."

"Again?"

Greg sighed. "He did before about stupid little things...but I just can't take too much more of anything. This is way too confusing and painful..."

"I know." Warrick said softly.

Greg sighed again, heavier this time. "But Nick's worth every last bit of it."

* * *

The medical stuff may not be 100 accurate, but at least I tried my best. Nick's going to have the surgery if that wasn't clear. Next chapter should be up soon. Thanks for the reviews. 


	15. Feel the Silence

Greg knew that if he had anything left in his stomach he would be throwing up right now. He was thankful he didn't, but also wished he did for the sole reason that he wouldn't have to be standing where he was right now, looking at Nick through the glass and feeling like the world was about to end. 

The silence around him made it feel like he was being crushed. Air simply refused to flow in and out of his lungs like it normally should. Greg knew that if he hadn't been holding himself up against the wall, he would have collapsed long ago without the will to get back up.

Greg bit the inside of his cheek as hard as he could. He didn't stop when he the metal taste of blood touched his tongue. He only bit harder. Despite his best effort, this did nothing to stop the tears from falling from his eyes. He was astonished he had any tears left to cry. All he could do was stare at Nick through the tears and glass as the doctor's words echoed through his head.

Nick had gotten out of surgery four hours ago, and his heart was working better than expected. Then everything went wrong. Dr. Leavell said something Greg didn't understand until the last sentence.

_"...probably won't make it through the night..."_

More tests had been run, resulting in only more bad news. The rest of the team was in the waiting room trying to comfort each other. The only hope that was left was if Nick could make it through the night, he could end up pulling through. But the odds weren't in his favor.

Docter Leavell had allowed everyone to go in and see Nick quickly, even though he wasn't awake. Everyone had entered and left with tears streaming down their face. Greg was the only one left. How was he supposed to go in there without his heart completely shattering?

The deafening silence was broken by an older nurse who had been concerned about Greg for quite some time. "You go in and stay with him for as long as you'd like."

Greg turned around and forced a smile. "I don't know if I can."

The nurse smiled sweetly. "I think you'd regret it if you didn't at least give it a shot." She said before turning and leaving.

Greg sighed heavily. He knew she was right. He just didn't want to admit it. Now that he knew the full story of what had happened to Nick, he didn't think he was ever gonna be able to look him in the eyes again without his heart breaking from the immense amount of guilt he felt.

_Greg didn't know why he had been told to go to Archie's A/V lab, but now he was sitting next to Warrick with Grissom standing behind them. They were all staring at a blank screen, and everyone but Greg seemed to know what was going on._

_"So...is someone gonna tell me what's happening or am I supposed to guess?"_

_He could hear Grissom sigh behind him. "After processing the scene where you and Nick were...we found another video collection."_

_"Another?" Greg asked without turning around._

_He saw Warrick nod out of the corner of his eye. "Yeah...remember when Nick was stalked? Crane kept a video collection of himself talking about Nick and everything. We found another one in the part of the house that was almost finished being built."_

_"Did you find anything else?" Greg said quietly._

_"We found the room where they were keeping Nick."_

_Greg nodded slowly. "So what's on these tapes?"_

_"We haven't actually watched them yet." Archie chimed in. "So we don't really know what to expect."_

_"I just thought you both should know we have these and you can see them if you want...but it's probably not going to be good." Grissom added._

_"Play it Archie." Greg said softly, still staring at the screen._

_Archie looked at Warrick and Grissom, who both nodded. He pushed play._

_The blank screen turned to an image of Nick, laying on his back on the floor. His right hand was clutching his left collarbone, and it was evident he was trying not to scream. He turned his head to the side and spit blood from his mouth before slowly forcing himself to sit up._

_The dark bruises on his chest were covered by the crimson blood flowing from between Nick's fingers. Everyone in the room knew that Nick had been shot in the collarbone and was why he was bleeding so bad. Nigel came into view of the camera from behind where the camera was positioned. He was holding a gun in his hand and tossed it to Ethan, who they couldn't see._

_Nigel walked over and stood right behind Nick. He leaned down slowly before he put all of his weight on the hand Nick was holding on his shoulder. Nick yelled out in pain, causing Greg to cringe from the sound and thought of how much pain Nick was in. Nigel laughed wickedly before he stood and kicked Nick in the ribs. Nick rolled to his other side and coughed up more blood onto the cement floor. It was clear he was having a lot of trouble catching his breath and keeping himself from passing out._

_"It's a fairly simple question, Nick. There's really no need for sarcastic comments like that."_

_Nick finally caught enough of his breath to force out, "Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer." That only earned Nick another good kick to his already broken ribs. "I already told you...what the fuck do you want me to say?"_

_"I want you to tell me the truth."_

_"I did." Nick's voice was raspy and his breathing was heavy and strained._

_"I'll give you a chance to rethink your answer." Nigel said as he crossed his arms and stared down at Nick. Nick's chest was moving up and down at a painful rate. Everytime he exhaled, you could clearly see all of the broken ribs he had and how skinny he was now. The jeans he was wearing looked like they belonged to a guy twenty pounds heavier than Nick._

_"I don't care...what you do to me...I'm not changing...my mind." Nick choked out._

_Nigel forcefully moved Nick so he was laying flat on his back again. He stood with one foot on the ground and the other hovering above Nick's groin. "I'm going to ask you one more time..."_

_"Go right ahead." Nick said._

_"Do you love him?" Nigel asked. He didn't have to wait too long for Nick's answer._

_"Yes."_

_"Wrong answer." Nigel said and shook his head. He slammed his foot down as hard as he could onto Nick's groin, making the other man yell out. Nick tried to roll over and away from Nigel, but he didn't have the strength to move. "Have you not listened to everything I've told you about him? Do you not understand that all the pain you've gone through recently is because of him? You're too good for him Nick, you know that."_

_Nick merely shook his head. "Fuck you."_

_Nigel kicked out again, this time harder. He hit Nick so hard that the pain knocked the air out of his lungs, making it impossible for him to scream. Nick closed his eyes tightly and clenched his teeth together, but that did nothing for the pain. Once air started flowing back into his lungs, Nick took the opportunity while he still had it._

_"Nothing you do...or say to me...will change that..." Nick said through his clenched jaw._

_"What if he didn't love you?" Nigel asked. "What if he found out about you and that little blonde you had sex with?"_

_"You drugged me...and tied me down..."_

_"So what? He doesn't have to know that. After that note you left him, he's probably moved on too." Nick flinched slightly at that thought. "I'm sure you've already thought of that though. Another guy laying with him, comforting him in more ways than one while you're gone..."_

_Nick shook his head slowly. "Still doesn't change my answer."_

_"That's a shame. Because after this, he's never going to want to see or talk to you ever again."_

Greg felt the same exact way he did right now as he did when he was watching that stupid tape. At first it felt like someone had put his heart in a blender, but now he couldn't feel anything. He knew it was because his heart was completely broken and he wasn't allowed to feel sad for the man lying in the hospital bed through the glass in front of him. His heart knew he didn't deserve to feel anything but guilt for what Nick had done for him.

Greg remembered everything about the beginning of his relationship with Nick. He loved the entire four years, but the first few months were his favorite. It was exciting and everything Greg had thought it would be. He wish he could go back and do it all again, but better this time. He regretted every second he didn't tell Nick how much he loved him and how happy he was that they were together. Now he might not ever get that chance ever again.

_This is better than not saying anything at all... _Greg thought. He sighed and wiped the tears from his eyes. He slowly walked over to the door to Nick's room and put his shaky hand on the doorknob. It felt like the door weighed a ton as he pushed it open and stepped inside. Before he could change his mind, Greg had silently slipped into the chair beside Nick's bed and carefully laced their fingers together. He didn't want to cause any more pain than he already had.

He couldn't stop the tears from running down his cheeks once again. And now that he was here, sitting next to Nick, he could feel the sharp pain in his heart again. He wanted to get up and run as far away from here so he wouldn't have to see what he did to Nick. But the hand he was holding in his kept him from doing that. He wasn't gonna let Nick go this time.

It took a little while for the lump in his throat to go away, but when it finally did he was able to speak softly, even though he knew that Nick probably couldn't hear him.

"Hey sweetie." Greg said softly. He gently rubbed the side of Nick's hand with his thumb. "I...I don't even know what to say. I guess I'm sorry is a pretty good start. I know why you were gone now...I saw the tapes Nigel made. I'm so sorry Nicky...if I had known what they were doing to you..."

Greg's voice broke and he forced himself not to think about that. "This isn't fair to you...you're such an amazing person, but for some reason I'm the one that's okay and you're fighting for your life." Greg shook his head slowly and couldn't stop himself from gently brushing his hand through Nick's hair. "If you make it outta this like I know you can...you gotta get away from me. You deserve someone better than me. I actually wanted them to let you die...that's how awful of a person I am. I wish this never happened to you...I wish that I had told you every second from the minute I met you how much I love you."

Greg stood up slowly. "I love you _so much_ Nick..." He said before leaning down and gently brushing his lips over Nick's. He closed his eyes and turned to leave, but something was holding him back.

Greg looked down and realized his hand was still holding Nick's. He tried to let it go, but he just physically couldn't. He sank back down into his chair and sighed slightly. He knew there was no way in hell he was going to leave Nick by himself. He needed to be with him as much as Nick needed Greg to be there.


	16. So Outta Line

After a few hours of sitting by Nick's side, Greg had finally fallen asleep with his head resting next to Nick shoulder. It was an awkward position, but better than trying to rest in that uncomfortable plastic chair he was sitting in. Greg didn't want to fall asleep in case something happened, but he really didn't have too much say in the matter when his body forced his eyes closed. He was asleep in minutes. 

It was the first time in a long time Greg had been able to sleep without having any nightmares or dreams about Nick. So when he felt someone shaking his hand, he wasn't too happy to be woken up. Until he opened his eyes and saw Nick's looking back at him.

"You're...you're awake..." Greg said softly.

Nick smiled weakly. He tried to speak, but his throat was too dry and scratchy to do so. Greg looked down when he noticed Nick was still shaking his hand. That's when he realized he wasn't trying to wake him up, his entire body was shaking. His hands were the worst but his legs and shoulders were pretty close in the running.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to get the nurse?" Greg asked.

Nick shook his head and swallowed a couple times before he could finally speak. "No...I don't need anyone...but you..." Nick didn't sound like himself at all, but that was the last thing on Greg's mind.

Greg smiled through the tears falling down his face. "I'm so glad you're okay Nicky." Greg said. He rubbed the side of Nick's hand gently and brushed his hand through Nick's hair.

"Are you okay?" Nick asked.

Greg nodded. "I'm fine, thanks to you."

Nick saw the look in Greg's eyes and read his mind. "You know...don't you?"

"Yeah...I saw the tapes of what they did to you."

Nick shook his head slowly. "They...taped it?"

Greg nodded again. "Yeah, they did. I get why you were gone now and I'm so sorry I was mad at you and told them to let yo-" Greg stopped himself, but not in time.

"Told who to what?" Nick asked. He was still shaking, but it was slowing beginning to let up.

Greg closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Maybe if he told Nick the truth, Nick would realize he needs to get away from Greg before something worse happens to him. "The doctors asked Warrick whether or not to go through with your surgery cuz he has your power of attorney...and he asked me what I thought and I...I told them to let you die." Greg basically whispered the last part, but Nick heard him clearly. He stopped shaking and just closed his eyes. He didn't know what to say, but knew he had to say something.

"I don't blame you there." He said softly.

Greg shook his head even though Nick couldn't see him. "No...I was just confused and mad and didn't want you to suffer."

Nick opened his eyes and smiled sadly. "It's okay...I'm gonna die anyway."

Greg squeezed Nick's hand gently. "Don't say that, you're awake now and you're gonna be okay."

"I don't think so...this is it G."

Greg could feel the tears falling faster and running all the way down his neck. "No...don't say that to me...you have to be okay Nick."

"I am okay...you're okay, so I'm fine."

* * *

Greg stared through yet another glass window, except this time he wasn't looking at Nick. He was watching the interrogation of Nigel Crane. He was standing next to Catherine, and the two watched in silence as Warrick tried his hardest not to punch Crane in the face.

"So, you admit to kidnapping and torturing Nick?" Warrick asked. He stood next to the seated Crane with his arms crossed. Brass sat across the table from Nigel and was watching Warrick carefully in case he snapped and tried to hurt their suspect.

Nigel shrugged. "I guess you could call it kidnapping. But tortured isn't the right word. I was trying to help him."

"How's that?" Brass asked.

"He was making a mistake. Nick was wasting his time with that kid, and he was only gonna end up getting hurt. I didn't want to see that, so I tried to show him."

"By beating him and pumping him with drugs?" Warrick asked. His voice was steadily rising along with his temper.

Nigel sighed. "I had to get him to listen somehow. That guy is so stubborn. He actually thinks he's in love with Greg."

"He is." Warrick said flatly.

Nigel shook his head. "He can't be. He's way too good for him, everyone knows it."

Silent tears started running down Greg's face. Catherine rubbed his arm soothingly and tried to hold back her own tears. She couldn't even begin to imagine how hard all of this had been on Greg, and the sight of it broke her heart. But Greg wasn't crying because of that. He was crying because he agreed with Nigel.

"That's not really your place to play Cupid." Brass said. He was also starting to lose it with this guy. "Nick's happy with him, isn't that good enough for you?"

"No. He could have been with anyone."

"Like you?" Warrick asked.

Nigel snorted with laughter. "Please. I like Nick a lot, but not like that. We're more like brothers." Warrick cringed at that thought. "I'm not gay either."

Warrick stared at Crane for a few minutes before he was able to think of something to say. "So that's the real problem? That Nick's gay?"

Nigel nodded. "Bingo." The expression on Warrick's face wasn't what Nigel had expected. "Oh, come on Warrick. You can't honestly tell me that you're okay with the fact that your best friend is gay. Greg...yeah I can see that because that kid's already got enough problems...but Ni-"

Nigel didn't get to finish his sentence. He was inturrupted by Warrick's fist smashing into his nose and sending him flying backwards over his chair and onto the cement floor. Brass hesistated briefly before standing up and grabbing Warrick's arm, pretending to hold him back.

"If you ever, **ever** say anything like that about Nick or Greg again, I will kill you." Warrick said down to Nigel's bloody face. "I don't know how you thought you were gonna get away with saying that bullshit to me about them, but you were dead wrong about everything." Warrick said before he turned and left the interrogation room, with no protest from Brass.

"He's got a point." Brass said as Nigel slowly got to his feet and back into the chair. He had to supress a smile, even though he didn't want to.

Warrick reappeared on the other side of the glass window and immediatly walked up to Greg. He grabbed the younger man by the shoulders and spun him around so they were face to face. The tears were falling faster from Greg's eyes and it was clear to Warrick he was on the verge of breaking down.

"Listen to me Greg." Warrick said softly. "I've told you this before, and I'm gonna tell you again. Nick loves you. Nothing anyone says can change that. Don't listen to what that jackass said, because it's not true. The only problem you have is not seeing what a great person you are."

Greg smiled weakly. "Thanks for sticking up for me Warrick."

Warrick smiled back and squeezed Greg's shoulders. "That's what friends are for."

* * *

Thanks for the reviews. Next chapter should be up soon. 


	17. I Need You

Nick groaned at the fact that the morphine drip that was in his arm was doing nothing to ease the pain. He could honestly care less about the throbbing of his collarbone or the other aches he had throughout his entire body. It was the heaviness and searing pain he felt in his heart that was hurting him the most. He knew it wasn't from the heart attack he had suffered either, although that probably wasn't helping. It was the fact that he knew he had hurt Greg that made him want to give up. He didn't blame Greg for telling the doctors or whoever to let him die. He just wished he could have a chance to make everything okay again. 

Doctors and nurses had been in and out of Nick's room, running tests and checking up on him. They were still pretty shocked he had woken up and wasn't in more pain. Truth is Nick had gotten used to pain, so it didn't really affect him too much anymore. The doctors were still worried about Nick's heart. They were constantly checking to make sure his heartbeat and blood pressure were normal. The heavy sedatives he was given made it hard for Nick to stay awake, but he fought against them in hopes that Greg would come back in.

He had talked to Warrick a little while ago. He had told Nick all about the interrogation with Nigel and what had happened. Nick was glad someone had gotten to hit Crane. He couldn't stand how Nigel talked about Greg. The entire time he had been held captive by them that's all they said. Nick actually thought it was the other way around. He thought Greg was too good for him and couldn't understand why they were together, but was glad for it nevertheless.

Nick was just about to fall asleep when the door opened and Greg slipped in.

"Sorry...I'll let you sleep." He turned to leave, but was stopped by Nick's voice.

"No. Don't go." He said. His voice had gotten closer to normal over the last few days. It had been a while since he had last seen Greg, and he wasn't going to miss his chance just because he was tired.

Greg slowly walked over to the chair still next to Nick's bed. He sat down and smiled as best as he could. "The doctor's said you were getting better. They think you can make it."

Nick nodded slowly. "I know, that's all they keep telling me." Greg's smile widened a little. Nick took a deep breath and willed himself not to start shaking. "I...never really got a good chance to apologize to you about what I did."

Greg shook his head. "You don't have to Nicky, I know it wasn't your fault."

"That still doesn't make it better." Nick smiled sadly. "When I came back and saw how much I had hurt you...that hurt more than anything anyone could have done to me. Getting shot, stabbed, burned...were nothing compared to that look in your eyes."

Greg reached out and threaded his fingers through Nick's. "That was before I understood what you did. I know now that you were trying to save me, and you did."

"I had no choice. I couldn't let them hurt you."

"I just wish they hadn't hurt you so badly." Greg said as he looked over Nick's battered body.

"It really wasn't that bad. Thinking about you the entire time really helped. They didn't know how to counteract that."

A few tears slowly fell down Greg's cheeks. "I...can't believe you did that...went through everything you did...for me."

Nick smiled and squeezed Greg's hand. "I love you. I'd do anything for you."

Greg ran his hand through Nick's hair again. He could never stop himself from doing that. "I love you so much Nick...if I had lost you...I don't know what I would have done."

"You would have been fine. You're so strong, you can get through anything Greggo." The tears started falling faster from Greg's eyes. "I don't...I don't blame you if you wanna break up with me." Nick said softly.

Greg shook his head slowly. "Why would I wanna do that?"

"I haven't exactly been the best boyfriend these last few months. It'd be the smart thing for you to do."

Greg rubbed Nick's hand with his tumb and smiled sweetly at him. "No, it would be the biggest mistake of my life if I let you go. I almost lost you a couple of times already...nothing's gonna make me unlove you."

Nick smiled. "Thats good...because I really need you Greg. I need you like you would not believe."

* * *

A few weeks later, Nick had been released from the hospital. His condition had improved so much, the doctors all agreed that the best thing for him was to finally go home. He had to be careful of what he ate, take a lot of meds and rest, but he was finally home. 

The first thing he did when he got home was take a nice long, hot shower. He stood under the water and let it wash over all of his new scars and the bruises that hadn't gone away yet. When the water started to get cold, he got out and dressed himself in sweatpants and a t-shirt and headed out into the kitchen where he smelled Greg cooking something good.

"What are you cooking?" Nick asked as he walked up behind Greg and wrapped his arms around the younger man's waist. He answered his own question. "Your famous scrambled eggs."

"With 30 less fat." Greg added. He laughed when Nick groaned behind him. "You know you can't eat anything good for a while because of your heart, so don't try and make me feel bad about it cuz it won't work."

"Fine." Nick said as he walked over to the table. "Meanie." He said when he sat down at the table and crossed his arms for dramatic effect.

Greg just shook his head. "Not gonna work." He said simply. He carried over two plates of eggs and toast with two glasses of orange juice. They ate in silence, neither completely sure what to say. They hadn't talked about what had happened since Greg's second visit, so there wasn't much left to talk about. When they had finished eating, Greg cleared the table, depsite protests from Nick.

"Relax." Greg said with a smile. "You don't have to do anything but relax, okay?"

Nick sighed. "Fine. Whatever you say G." Nick yawned and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Go to bed, get some sleep." Greg said.

"Only if you come with me."

Greg smiled and pushed Nick gently towards their room. "Deal."

Soon enough, they were laying in their bed. Nick let his tired eyes close as soon as he rested his head on the pillow. He shifted a few times before he was comfortable and laid completely still. Greg kissed his forhead gently, then his cheek before he moved down to his jawline and neck. Before either one of them realized it, Greg had taken Nick's shirt off and was slowly kissing every single bruise and scar gently. He went back and traced his finger over the scar on Nick's chest from his surgery. He couldn't stop the tears from building up in his eyes and eventually running down his cheeks.

Nick opened his eyes and looked up at Greg. He reached up and gently brushed his tears away with his thumbs. "What's wrong?" He asked.

"Nothing." Greg leaned down and kissed Nick's lips gently. "I'm fine."

Nick looked deep into Greg's eyes. "You still hate me, don't you." He whispered.

Greg shook his head. "No, of course not. I could never hate you Nicky. I just...I'm just so glad you're okay. It doesn't feel real...I'm afraid it's another dream I'm gonna wake up from and you won't be here."

"I'm right here." Nick said against Greg's lips. He kissed him deeply and slipped his hands under Greg's shirt. He ran his hands over his chest and back before pulling off Greg's shirt altogether.

Nick rolled them over so he was on top of Greg, still kissing him as hard as he could. He pulled Greg's hips as close to his own as he could. Greg pulled away from Nick's lips and gently pushed against him.

"Nick, we can't have sex. I don't want to hurt you."

"You're not going to." He said as he started kissing Greg's neck.

"Yes I will. I don't want to **ever** hurt you like that."

Nick pulled back so he was looking Greg right in the eyes. "Then you won't. I want you to know I'm still here, and I always will be here for you."

Greg tried to protest, but was cut off by another breath taking kiss. All thought was gone as he got lost in everything he had missed so much. The way Nick smelt, tasted, and felt was something Greg wanted to last forever. If this was a dream, it was the best one Greg had ever had.


	18. Just Like I Remember

"They let someone who killed two people out on parole?" Warrick asked dumbfounded. 

Brass nodded slowly. "Yepp. He apparently had made a lot of progress in the mental hospital he was sent to, and they let him visit home on weekends. He was staying with his brother, Ethan, who was building a house out here."

Catherine shook her head. "Shouldn't he have gone to jail? He killed two people." She repeated Warrick's previous statement.

"That's not where he belonged. He needed a different kind of help. They just thought the best thing for him was to get some normalcy back into his life so he could get better." Grissom said in his usual matter-of-fact tone.

"He took _normal_ as torturing Nick." Warrick said flatly.

"Guys, I appreciate the uproar, but it wasn't all that bad." Nick said with a shrug.

"Don't stand up for him." Warrick said.

"I'm not. Trust me, I hate that guy more than all of you combined. But now he's gone for good...I hope...and I'm okay. So what happened is over, there's nothing we can do about it now."

Warrick knew this was the best way for Nick to cope with what had happened to him. Moving on as soon as possible was best, so he wasn't going to make it more of a big deal than Nick was going to. "Yeah, you're right. We got them both for life."

Greg sighed. "Unless they get let out on parole or something."

Catherine hit his arm. "Don't joke around about it Greg." But everyone else started laughing, so she rolled her eyes and joined in.

They were inturrupted by a soft knock at the door. "Sorry...I can come back."

"No Alex, it's okay." Grissom said, waving him in. "You haven't gotten a chance to meet Nick yet anyway." Nick stood as Alex walked over to him and they shook hands. "Nick Stokes, Alex Ryan."

"Nice to meet you." Nick said with a smile.

"You too. I'm glad you got better and everything." He said, the nervousness apparent in his voice.

Grissom broke the building awkwardness. "Do you have anything on the case?"

Alex turned to his boss. "Yeah. Hodges matched the paint from the street lamp to the suspects SUV. And he said something about you owing him for breaking the case again."

"We don't listen to Hodges. Next time he says something stupid like that, as him about his girlfriend." Nick said.

"He has a girlfriend?" Alex asked.

"Nope." Warrick and Nick said in unison. Everyone started laughing, melting away the tension that had started to build when Alex and Nick had met. Soon afterward, everyone left the breakroom to go to their respective evidence for their cases. All except for Nick and Warrick.

They hadn't gotten a chance to talk since Nick had come back. Warrick had covered for Greg at the lab so he could stay with Nick while he was in the hospital and when Nick was still recovering at home. Neither one was sure of what to say, so Nick went first.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Why?" Warrick asked. "You didn't do it on purpose."

Nick sighed. "I know, but it was still rough on both you and Greg. I didn't mean it to be like that...I didn't have a choice."

"I know man, it's alright. The important thing is that you're okay."

"I wanted to thank you too, for looking out for him when I was gone."

"It was no problem...he's my friend too."

"I know. But still, thanks."

"Anytime." Warrick said with a smile. "So are you feeling better?"

"Yeah, I'm fine now. Just took a little while for everything to heal."

"I bet. You were pretty banged up."

Nick nodded. "Yeah...they had fun doing it too." He hesistated for a second before saying, "Brass told me what Nigel said when you interrogated him."

Warrick wasn't really sure what to say. "Oh...yeah, he was being an ass."

"He was never a very nice person."

Warrick laughed. "I never really liked the guy after he pushed you outta that window and everything. I was never a fan."

Nick laughed as well. "Yeah, that was pretty fucked up. I didn't even do anything to him either."

Warrick nodded in agreement. "Seriously though..." He said, switching tones. "I'm really glad you came back and that you're okay. And before you do, don't apologize. Everything's cool."

Nick smiled his thanks and the two friends fell into their usual conversations about sports and movies. They soon ended up going out and getting some food before they headed back to Nick's house to watch yet another basketball game on TV, just like old times.

* * *

Sorry this chapter was so short. I promise the next one will be much longer, and up very soon. I already have it half done. I'm pretty sure there's going to be two more chapters left. Thanks for the reviews, they mean a lot. 


	19. Perfect Timing

Things got back to normal very quickly. Nick recovered a lot faster than anyone thought he was going to. The bruises and cuts healed, he got his energy level back up to almost normal and he was able to go back to work. Everything in the field and lab went smoothly, as if Nick had never even been gone. But there was still the gossip floating around the hallways of the lab constantly. Everyone had their own veriation of what happened, and no one but the graveyard shift seemed to know what actually happened. They were the only people that really mattered anyway. 

Grissom was thoroughly pleased with how things were going. It had been hell without Nick, and he would be the first one to admit it. Nick's the guy that's friends with everyone and kept the team together no matter what. Without him, everyone had a hard time accepting it. Especially Warrick and Greg. But now that he was back, things were better than they ever had before. He realized just how much he'd missed it when he heard Nick and Warrick laughing in the break room. Grissom couldn't help but smile as he walked in and saw the two friends sitting at the table playing paper football.

"Nick wanted another rematch?" The supervisor asked as he went over to the counter and filled a mug with coffee.

"Yeah, he can't get over the fact that he can't beat me."

"Yes I can!" Nick argued. "I just haven't been able to lately."

Warrick flicked the folded up piece of paper through Nick's fingers. "When have you ever beaten me?"

"Don't worry about the details. But I have beaten you, don't worry." Once again, he slid the paper just a little too hard and sent it sailing over the edge of the table.

Warrick rolled his eyes. "Yeah, right. Just like all those times you've beaten me in Madden."

"That's not fair though because you own the game and play every single day. Your team is so good, it's basically like cheating."

Grissom took a seat at the table and shook his head with a smile on his face. "Now boys, no fighting. We have a long night ahead of us."

Warrick flicked another one through Nick's fingers, ending the game. "Oh yeah? What do we have?" He asked.

"You're gonna have to wait for the rest of the team."

The two younger men groaned in unison. "Come on Gris." Nick pleaded. "I haven't even seen Sara or Catherine yet, and Archie's got Greg playing some video game for the last half hour." Perfectly on cue, Catherine, Sara, and Greg walked into the breakroom and took seats around the table. Grissom stood up and grinned at Nick.

"See, it wasn't that long of a wait Nicky."

Nick shrugged. "This happens to me all the time. Bad timing."

Grissom shook his head and looked down at the assignment slips in his hand. "Okay, we have a busy night tonight guys. Catherine, take Sara on the double homicide in Henderson, I'll meet you guys there." Cathering grabbed the slip from Grissom and left with Sara. "Warrick, you and Nick have a 419 in a run down motel off strip. Brass is already there, and he's really lonely so hurry up and get out there."

"Do I get the night off?" Greg asked hopefully.

Grissom shook his head. "No, you get a B and E out in Summerville. Sofia said it should be a pretty easy case."

Greg sighed for dramatic effect. "Gee, thanks. An easy case out in Summerville with Sofia."

"Wanna trade?" Warrick asked, holding the assignment slip out to the younger CSI.

"Nah, I'll pass." Greg said, shaking his head. "As much as I love to work with Nick, he distracts me. And I could use an easy night." He said with a wide smile.

Warrick headed for the door, with Nick right behind him. "You're such a dork." Nick said to his boyfriend as he playfully pushed him and walked by.

"Love you too." He said to Nick's retreating back. That earned him one of Nick's famous smiles thrown over his shoulder. Greg smiled back before turning to Grissom. "Alright, I'm gonna head out there then. I guess I might see you back here...or I might not if I close this case in 30 seconds."

Grissom shook his head, but smiled nonetheless. "Don't get your hopes up so soon Greg."

"Oh I never do." The ex-lab rat said before he left the lab. He wasn't sure why, but he had a funny feeling. He couldn't describe it, but it wouldn't go away. He hopped into his car and started the engine. But when the music blared through the speakers and filled his ears, he soon forgot about his weird feeling and started driving towards his crime scene, singing along with every song that came on the radio.

* * *

"Wow...I really forgot how much a double shift can take out of you." Nick said. He flopped down on the couch in the break room and sighed heavily. 

"That was more like a triple man. It's almost time to clock back in." Warrick said as he took a seat next to his best friend.

"Go home and get some rest guys." Grissom said from the doorway behind them. They turned and looked at their supervisor. "We have a really slow night tonight. Sara and Catherine are gonna stay here because they didn't have to do as mush as you two on our case. You both need some sleep, I'll see you tomorrow night." He left as quickly as he had come.

"Well that's a relief." Warrick said happily.

Nick nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I could use some sleep. See ya tomorrow man." He said.

"Later." Warrick returned before the door closed behind Nick.

Since he had no need to go to the locker room, Nick headed right out towards his car. He stopped, however, and popped his head into Hodges' lab when he saw that the lab tech was clearly annoying Alex.

"They all love me here, even if they don't show it." Hodges was saying just as Nick came in.

"We certainly do Hodges. You're like the stray dog that doesn't go away because we fed you."

Alex laughed. "Yeah, that's the impression I got to." He grabbed his results from Hodges and turned to leave. "See ya Nick."

"Bye Alex." He said with a little wave. "Why do you have to pick on the new guy?" Nick asked.

Hodges shrugged. "I wasn't picking on him, just letting him know how things work around here."

"Right..." Nick said sarcatically. "Hey, have you seen Greg at all tonight?"

"Actually...I saw him heading out back with a friend of his I guess. Some guy came and visited him about 10 minutes ago...Jeremy something or other."

Nick's stomach dropped. He basically ran out of Hodges lab and towards the back exit to the alley behind the lab. He burst through the door and didn't have to look far before he saw Greg slouched up against the wall. He was being held in place by a taller guy, undoubtedly his ex-boyfriend Jeremy. Greg's shoulders were firmly being held against the wall by the stronger man, who was forcing Greg to kiss him. Nick got over to his boyfriend as quickly as he could, which was right around when Jeremy finished undoing Greg's jeans and started tugging them down.

"Get off him!" Nick yelled as he pulled Jeremy away from Greg, who fell to his knees. When Jeremy shook Nick off and tried to get back to Greg, Nick punched him in the face, sending him to the conrete. With perfect timing, Warrick came out and right over to them, dragging Jeremy off the ground and back inside without a word. All he had to do was look at Nick, who nodded, telling him everything was okay and to take care of that guy.

Nick kneeled down in front of Greg and firmly put his hands on Greg's shoulder to steady him. "You alright Greg?" He asked softly.

Greg nodded slowly. "Yeah...he just...I was too tired to fight him off...I didn't wanna ki-"

Nick cut him off. "Shhh...I know, it's okay. Just relax. He's gone now, you're safe." Greg looked up at Nick and smiled weakly. That gave Nick a chance to see the bruise forming just under Greg's left eye. "That son of a bitch...he hit you?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah." He whispered as tears started running down his face.

Nick gently brushed them away. "It's okay sweetie, you're safe now...I promise."

Greg fell forward slightly until his chest was pressed against Nick's and he buried his head into the crook of Nick's neck. He wrapped his arms around the older man's neck and tried to stop himself from shaking. Nick wrapped his arms around Greg's waist and gently pulled him closer.

"He w-was gonna try and r-rape me a-again." He stuttered. Sobs threatened to take over his tired body.

Nick pulled his hips back slightly and moved his hands down to redo Greg's jeans. He then carefully slid his hands up the back of Greg's shirt and rubbed soothing cirlces on the scared skin slowly with his warm hands. "It's okay, he's gone. I'm here now, you don't have anything to worry about. I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you, okay?"

Greg nodded against Nick's neck. "He just scares me."

Nick pulled Greg tightly against him. "I know...but he can't hurt you anymore."

"I didn't want to kiss him." Greg shivered slightly. "I couldn't stop him because I'm so tired and have a headache because when he punched me my head hit the wall and I didn't realize what was going on until you came out..."

Nick loosened his grip on Greg and pulled back so he was looking Greg in the eyes. "It's okay, I believe you. There's nothing to worry about."

Greg nodded slowly. "Okay." He said, and smiled. "Can we go home now?"

"If you don't wanna go to the hospital." Nick said.

Greg shook his head right away. "No, not at all. I hate it there, and I don't need to. So can we just go home, please?"

Nick smiled and nodded. "Of course, le'ts go sweetie." He said as he helped Greg to his feet. He threaded their fingers together and started walking them towards Nick's car parked out front.

Greg squeezed Nick's hand. "Thanks Nicky." He said.

Nick shook his head slightly. "For what?"

Greg shrugged and looked down at the ground. He smiled and looked back up at Nick. "For being you."

* * *

The last chapter should be up soon. Thanks for the reviews, they meant a lot. 


	20. Storybook Ending

Greg fell asleep on the couch as soon as they got home. He changed quickly before returning back into the living room, stretching out on the couch and falling fast asleep. Nick smiled and covered his boyfriend in a warm blanket. He then went into the kitchen to try and figure out something to eat. Greg was undoubtedly going to be hungry when he woke up. But after a few minutes, Nick heard Greg muttering something in his sleep. Afraid he was having a nightmare, Nick quietly went back into the living room and kneeled beside Greg's sleeping body. 

It was hard to understand, but Nick could finally make out Greg saying, "Please come back Nicky...I miss you..."

Nick shook Greg's shoulder gently, trying to wake him up. "I'm right here sweetie." He said.

"I can't sleep without you...please come back...I feel sick without you." Nick didn't have time to try and wake Greg up again. He started shaking slightly before rolling off of the couch and hitting his head on the coffee table. Hard. Greg woke up immediatly, still shaking.

"Fuck..." Nick said under his breath. Greg now had a cut above his right eyebrow that was slowly starting to bleed. He helped Greg back onto the couch before he quickly went and got a cold face cloth wrapped around an ice pack. He sat down on the couch next to Greg, who stretched back out and rested his head in Nick's lap. He winced when Nick put the cold cloth above his eye.

"That's really cold." He said.

"Gotta stop the swelling somehow." Nick said with a small smile. He pressed the ice pack gently against the forming bruise and held it in place. He stroked Greg's soft hair with his free hand. "Bad dream?" He asked.

Greg nodded. "Yeah...did I talk in my sleep?"

"Yeah, you kept asking me to come back and said how you can't sleep without me and feel sick."

Greg closed his eyes. "I dreamt about when I got sick from..." He trailed off, but was too late.

"Got sick from what? You got sick when I was gone?" Nick asked anxiously.

Greg kept his eyes closed. "I...it was just...I really missed you. And I tried to drink that pain away, but instead just got alcohol poisoning. No big deal."

Nick bit his lip and cursed himself. "I'm sorry G." He said softly.

Greg opened his eyes and looked up at Nick. "It's not your fault. I made a stupid mistake."

"Because of me."

Greg shook his head. "No, it wasn't your fault. You were gone to save me, I just missed you. I'm fine now, everything's okay."

"But if you...if anything had happened to you because of how much I hurt you, I never would have forgiven myself. I would do anything to have never hurt you Greg."

"I know." Greg said. He smiled up at Nick. "Remember when you made me promise to always remember that you love me and would do anything to keep me safe?"

"Yeah..." Nick wasn't entirely sure of where this was going.

"Well.." Greg continued, "I agreed to that for a reason. I know how much you love me because that just makes me love you more. That's the only reason you leaving hurt, was because I love you so much."

Nick leaned down and brushed his lips against Greg's. "I love you too." Greg's smile grew at the sound of those words. He always loved to hear Nick say them, because he could hear how much he meant it. Nick had that kind of power over him. No matter how bad of a day he was having or what was going wrong, Nick could always make it better. Even if it was just a simple smile or a light kiss. As long as it was Nick, it was perfect.

* * *

The trial went by slowly, but was finally over. Nigel and Ethan were both sentenced to life in jail without bail. Or parole. Nick had taken the entire thing very well. His testimony went smoothly, and he didn't seemed bothered by anything. Until Nigel's last statement before he was taken away. 

Nigel looked right into Nick's eyes and said, "You'll realize one day that I was right. I hope when you do, you have the guts to kill that little fagg."

Warrick had to hold Nick back so he wouldn't jump over the railing in front of him and strangle Nigel. The baliff quickly dragged Nigel and Ethan away, and Warrick brought Nick outside to calm him down. It wasn't easy, but need to be done.

"It's over Nick, it's done for good now man." Warrick said.

Nick sighed heavily. "Finally. What the fuck did I, or Greg, ever do to that guy? Why does he have to be such a fucking jerk?"

"That's how some people are. He's wrong, everyone knows that. What he says doesn't matter."

Nick nodded. "You're right...I just wish he wouldn't say all that stupid stuff about Greg. Thank God he didn't hear that." Warrick just nodded in agreement. Nick looked from the ground up to Warrick a few times before asking, "Did you think that when I first told you about us?"

Warrick didn't understand. "What are you talking about? Think what?"

"When I first told you about me and Greg...did you hate me for it?"

"Hate you for what?"

"Being g-" Nick started, but was cut off.

"Actually," Warrick said, "Don't answer that question. I should kick your ass for asking me that, but I won't cuz you're my best friend. Which is why I didn't think that, I never did. Of course not Nick. Why would you think that?"

Nick shrugged. "I don't know...he's just got my head all messed up. I just-"

Warrick cut him of again. "It's fine man, I understand. Go home and get some rest, you need it."

"Yeah...I really do."

Within the hour, Nick was walking into his house that he shared with Greg. As soon as he closed the door, Greg appeared from the hallway with a smile on his face.

"Hey Nick." Greg said as he walked up to his boyfriend. "How'd it go?" Greg was trying not to pay too much attention to how good Nick looked in that suit he was wearing.

"Both got life." He said simply. He wrapped his arms around Greg waist and pulled him so they were right up against each other and kissed him deeply.

"What's that for?" Greg asked with a smile when they broke apart.

Nick shrugged. "Because I love you." Greg wrapped his arms around Nick's neck when he leaned in for another kiss. Greg could feel the need and desperation flowing through Nick as he pushed Greg up against the wall and kissed him even harder. Greg tried to control his thoughts when Nick started kissing his neck and grinding their hips together. Greg reluctantly pushed Nick slightly away as gently as he could, only because he could tell something was wrong. His suspicions were confirmed when he met Nick's eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

Nick shook his head. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"Well now I know you're lying." Greg ran his fingers through the short hair on the back of Nick's head. "I can tell something's bothering you...what is it?"

Nick smiled slightly. "You know me too well." Greg just waited patiently for Nick to answer him. "I just...I don't know. I'm so scared to lose you...and I want to make everything okay again."

"You're not gonna lose me Nicky. And everything _is_ okay."

"I know...I just...I don't know how to explain it. I'm sorry."

Greg kissed Nick gently. "Don't be sweetie, I'm not mad at you. I just wanna help."

"I wish I wasn't so messed up and that I didn't need you as bad as I do."

Greg smiled sweetly. "You're not messed up. You're Nicky. And I love every little thing about you." Nick mirrored Greg's smile and kissed him again. "As good as you look in that suit, let's get you out of it and into bed. I'm as tired as you look."

Nick nodded. "Good idea." He followed Greg into the bedroom and changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. They crawled into their already warm bed, but cuddled together nonetheless. Nick wrapped his arms around Greg as the younger man rested his brown head on Nick's chest and sighed happily. Nick rested his cheek on the top of Greg's head and let his tired eyes slowly close.

"Goodnight Nick...I love you." Greg said sleepily.

Nick kissed Greg's hair. "Goodnight sweetie, I love you too."

Within minutes, they were both asleep in the comfort of each other's warmth. That's all they ever really needed. No matter what life threw at them, they knew at the end of the day they would always have each other. And even if things didn't seem to be going their way and it felt like everything was going wrong, they knew they were right. Despite anything, the fact that they loved each other was enough to keep them both going on, together. Forever.

* * *

Thank you to everyone who read this story, and a special thanks to those of you who reviewed. I'm going to be writing another Nick and Greg story, but this one is going to be slightly different than the ones I've written before using the same relationship. I hope you all read that story as well, and that you enjoyed reading this one as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thanks again. 


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